The year was 2006. I had graduated college a few years before and was making decent money as an engineer with benefits, perks etc. Up to that point my sexual experience was about as great as Greg Oden's NBA experience. I had some one night stands in college, especially in my Freshman and Senior years, but nothing serious. The women I usually hooked up with were in the 4-5 range, though with beer goggles I initially had them pegged as 7-8's. I knew something was lacking in my life. I had never had a girlfriend and I was damn sure at the time this meant I had a huge social defect. At that point, I thought everything else in my life was set except for my lack of a partner, a woman who I could come home to and spend time with.
Now I'm a short Asian dude. I bet if you asked a chick what my rating was, it couldn't be higher than a 4. But I also have my pride. I knew if I was going to be with a woman in the long run, she had to be someone I was really thirsting for. Otherwise what would be the point? Through a colleague, I met this beautiful Russian girl Julia who worked in accounting. She had it all: intelligence, beauty, was relatively laid back and down to earth, but could get emotional as women often do from time to time. I wanted her badly. I was willing to do anything. Put my job, future on the line. Anything.
We went on a few dates. They were usually at expensive fancy restaurants or expensive hipster hotspots. I tried to impress her with my position and money, I felt I wasn't good enough for her and was willing to do all I could to make her see how worthwhile it would be to spend time with me. After 12 dates and numerous gifts (which took about a 15K chunk out of my wallet), I invited her over to my place so I could cook for her and we could go from there. After the dinner, we watched a movie on my couch where I tried to make a move on her. She wasn't having it and furiously asked me what type of girl I thought she was. The rest of the night I acted pretty cold towards her out of frustration, but that next morning I pussied out and apologized to her by getting her an Ipod. We kept going on these dates, where she would hint at having sex later but always put that shyt on hold when the evening was over.
She was getting more emotional also. An example of this that still haunts me is when my older sister who had been battling AIDS passed away, I didn't go to her funeral because I had promised to help Julia move to a new apartment. I was so deep into this I lost my priorities and marginalized my friends and family. All the while, Julia must have thought I was an idiot for doing all this without any real sign of affection (besides a rare kiss on the cheek). A few days after the funeral, I broke down in the bathroom stall at work, crying for the first time since I was 10. I didn't see Julia that much for the rest of the week since I was doing testing offsite in another state. When I came back home I heard from my colleague that Julia had told the other women at the company what a bytch I was. How she could basically get free meals off of me by just barely pretending to tolerate my presence.It shattered my reputation and I believe was one of the reasons I received a negative evaluation on my next report even though my work had been exemplary thus far. To top it off, it was not secret that Julia had been fukking multiple guys at work and they had all been clowning on what a dumbass I was.
It's been over seven years since then. I've matured, regressed, basically just lived life. But I've never simped for a woman anymore. This was the experience that taught me inexperience to the game of women can be a dangerous mistake.
