Arranged marriages?

EARFQUAKE

EARFQUAKE

🥰
Supporter
Joined
Nov 5, 2015
Messages
13,798
Reputation
12,949
Daps
49,826
I was warming up to this idea for a whole year, my bff told me about it and she said they tend to work more than most marriages. Then last weekend this chick turned around and told me that it wouldn't work for me, it can only work for Asian cultures. I'm not sure what she meant by that...

I think this is the best option for me because I'm not proactive when it comes to dating and if I had a choice I'd be forever alone but I think it's my duty and obligation to get married and eventually have children.

My parents would, of course, be the match makers. They have a good eye for good people and I'm not picky anyway.

But what are your thoughts (I'm asking the females of the coli) on the idea of an Arranged Marriage for a black person in this generation? Is it a dumb idea or a necessary one for those who don't know how to make decisions in dating?

I haven't talked to my mom about this yet, she seems eager for me to date but I don't think I'm the dating type. Then there's my dad who tends to talk about guns when we talk about the opposite sex. If I do decide to go through with it, I'm looking to have an arrangement by the age of 27.
 
EARFQUAKE

EARFQUAKE

🥰
Supporter
Joined
Nov 5, 2015
Messages
13,798
Reputation
12,949
Daps
49,826
Poitier said:
I'm for it BUT you need 2 parent homes to choose good partners/orchestrate wealth-building and a society without lax or uneven divorce laws for it to work.
Click to expand...

I'm sure my parents would do their best to make sure both parties are well established before we tie the knot.


BmoreGorilla said:
My daughter is already set to marry my homeboy's son. They have no choice :jawalrus:
Click to expand...

Is that the same thing or is that considered a forced marriage?
 
Blackout

Blackout

just your usual nerdy brotha
Joined
Jan 26, 2013
Messages
39,992
Reputation
8,135
Daps
98,609
If your parents are choosing I say try it and see who they pull up.

Cant hurt to try.

BmoreGorilla said:
My daughter is already set to marry my homeboy's son. They have no choice :jawalrus:
Click to expand...
:dead:
 
Last edited:
Poitier

Poitier

My Words Law
Supporter
Joined
Jul 30, 2013
Messages
69,412
Reputation
15,439
Daps
246,376
b o u n c e said:
I'm ok with being by myself but in the long run I know I wouldn't feel right about that. Plus given the type of family I'm from it only makes sense I continue the legacy and give my parents more grandchildren.
Click to expand...

I don't think you should start a family to appease other people. You the only grandchild?
 
Ziggiy

Ziggiy

Veteran
Hall of Fame
Joined
May 2, 2012
Messages
64,617
Reputation
27,636
Daps
384,070
Reppin
Ft. Stewart, Ga
b o u n c e said:
I was warming up to this idea for a whole year, my bff told me about it and she said they tend to work more than most marriages. Then last weekend this chick turned around and told me that it wouldn't work for me, it can only work for Asian cultures. I'm not sure what she meant by that...

I think this is the best option for me because I'm not proactive when it comes to dating and if I had a choice I'd be forever alone but I think it's my duty and obligation to get married and eventually have children.

My parents would, of course, be the match makers. They have a good eye for good people and I'm not picky anyway.

But what are your thoughts (I'm asking the females of the coli) on the idea of an Arranged Marriage for a black person in this generation? Is it a dumb idea or a necessary one for those who don't know how to make decisions in dating?

I haven't talked to my mom about this yet, she seems eager for me to date but I don't think I'm the dating type. Then there's my dad who tends to talk about guns when we talk about the opposite sex. If I do decide to go through with it, I'm looking to have an arrangement by the age of 27.
Click to expand...

On the serious tip this is one of the more perplexing threads ive come across on the coli, and I don't mean this negatively at all but I couldn't IMAGINE an American black woman in this day and age submitting to an arranged Union. I know you said you only wanted a female opinion but I still believe that finding and choosing your own life partner is best. Even if you are anti-social I think you would ultimately feel more fulfilled with the man YOU fall in love with
 
EARFQUAKE

EARFQUAKE

🥰
Supporter
Joined
Nov 5, 2015
Messages
13,798
Reputation
12,949
Daps
49,826
Poitier said:
I don't think you should start a family to appease other people. You the only grandchild?
Click to expand...

No I have other siblings, my oldest brother is married so my parents have one grandchild so far.

We're very family oriented so their desires for me to be successful and get married is essentially mine as well, I just suck and can't function properly to do it on my own :yeshrug:

Ziggiy said:
On the serious tip this is one of the more perplexing threads ive come across on the coli, and I don't mean this negatively at all but I couldn't IMAGINE an American black woman in this day and age submitting to an arranged Union. I know you said you only wanted a female opinion but I still believe that finding and choosing your own life partner is best. Even if you are anti-social I think you would ultimately feel more fulfilled with the man YOU fall in love with
Click to expand...

I thought about that too but I have a bad habit of rejecting people, even the ones I like.
 
Poitier

Poitier

My Words Law
Supporter
Joined
Jul 30, 2013
Messages
69,412
Reputation
15,439
Daps
246,376
b o u n c e said:
No I have other siblings, my oldest brother is married so my parents have one grandchild so far.

We're very family oriented so their desires for me to be successful and get married is essentially mine as well, I just suck and can't function properly to do it on my own :yeshrug:
Click to expand...

I can relate :ld:
 
Vice Queen

Vice Queen

aka Joe Henny
Supporter
Joined
Jan 15, 2015
Messages
32,713
Reputation
9,334
Daps
116,491
I've already said that if it were up to my mother, I'd be well in my 40s and 50s by the time I get married. My father isn't concerned with our personal lives like that.

Either way, they'd choose someone with some money.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top