Anybody in here ever break off an engagement?
- Thread starter Yung Yogurt
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Wesley Pipes quotes
Banned
This is the worse possible advice
Read the OP's problems with the relationship.
1. Sex isn't fun anymore.
2. Young and fly, still getting looks from other women.
3. We don't do fun stuff anymore.
The only reason I could see dude not getting married is because he's immature. Everything he said could be fixed in a short period of time. Sex is boring? Put it in her butt. Young and fly? I highly doubt it and the looks don't stop when you get married. It's how you react. Not doing fun stuff? Ngga put her in the car and take her to the fun stuff. Marriage isn't a sprint. It's a marathon. There are going to be ups and downs. Sometimes your spouse is going to be "boring", but you got to guide them and get them out of that slump.
Sounds like immaturity and cold feet, which is understandable.
Read the OP's problems with the relationship.
1. Sex isn't fun anymore.
2. Young and fly, still getting looks from other women.
3. We don't do fun stuff anymore.
The only reason I could see dude not getting married is because he's immature. Everything he said could be fixed in a short period of time. Sex is boring? Put it in her butt. Young and fly? I highly doubt it and the looks don't stop when you get married. It's how you react. Not doing fun stuff? Ngga put her in the car and take her to the fun stuff. Marriage isn't a sprint. It's a marathon. There are going to be ups and downs. Sometimes your spouse is going to be "boring", but you got to guide them and get them out of that slump.
Sounds like immaturity and cold feet, which is understandable.
When I read the OP, I see nothing But red flags that will not change because vows were exchanged.
Bad sex, not enjoying their time together, she doesn't meet his "expectation". You think these problem will be resolved by marriage? Are you crazy?
Add to the fact he wants to get married to start a family? A kid will make every single red flag worse
You could try pre-marital counseling as someone else has suggested, and do it with anyone else if this doesn't pan out.been wit her 4 years (been living 2gether for 2)... she was great as a gf but lacks certain wife qualities that I always imagined my wife having. Plus as of late the sex has been mad boring and we don't really do fun shyt like we did in the first few years. And on my end I kinda want to tie the knot to start a family being 25 with no kids but at the end of the day I'm still a young fly nikka that gets attention from chicks without even trying.
What a fukking mess!
Because of this lacks certain wife qualities that I always imagined my wife having, you would find out things like this and other stuff that would be big reasons for you not to get married.
These are just examples:
1. You expect your wife to wash the dishes but she expects you to wash the dishes too.
2. She expects to do all the cooking but you like to cook too.
3. You want 3 kids. She wants no kids ever.
4. You want 1 kid and she wants 4 kids.
5. You want sex 3 times a week. She wants it once a month.
6. You want sex once a week and she wants it every day.
7. Name 10 things you find attractive about her.
8. You like to be frugal and save money. She likes to spend like an NBA wife golddigger. (money is a huge issue in marriage)
Wesley Pipes quotes
Banned
I think these problems can be resolved BEFORE marriage because they are relatively superficial.
He isn't saying they hadn't had sex in 3 months or something. He said the "sex is getting boring". Role-play, have her dress up. Have her work out!!!! Females who work out have higher sex drives.
Expectations? What did he say specifically? What is he looking for? Is it even realistic?
And I do agree kids are another obstacle. Not speaking to you but most have this 2 year living together before marriage rule which I think is awesome no matter your religion. I did it. Like they say living together is completely different than just dating. Being married is different than just dating. Being married and living together is different than dating and living together.
I think people should have MARRIED TIME, just you and your spouse during the first 3-5 years of marriage before kids. Travel, settle into careers, get finances straight, buy a house etc. How many people do this? Usually within those 2 years of dating and living together, a kid appears. Or the first year of marriage a kid appears. Think about that? You haven't even got a chance to "sit down". You haven't even got to know your spouse on the level of wife yet and now you won't get that chance really. I believe that's where a lot of marriages fail.
Good discussion breh.
Dirk Diggler
Pro
Me and mine have been together for 12 years married for 3 years lived together for 4 years before getting married
Mr Hate Coffee
Veteran
I would give you some advice but I have a sneaking suspicion you're not going to listen and marry her anyway.
I think these problems can be resolved BEFORE marriage because they are relatively superficial.
He isn't saying they hadn't had sex in 3 months or something. He said the "sex is getting boring". Role-play, have her dress up. Have her work out!!!! Females who work out have higher sex drives.
Expectations? What did he say specifically? What is he looking for? Is it even realistic?
And I do agree kids are another obstacle. Not speaking to you but most have this 2 year living together before marriage rule which I think is awesome no matter your religion. I did it. Like they say living together is completely different than just dating. Being married is different than just dating. Being married and living together is different than dating and living together.
I think people should have MARRIED TIME, just you and your spouse during the first 3-5 years of marriage before kids. Travel, settle into careers, get finances straight, buy a house etc. How many people do this? Usually within those 2 years of dating and living together, a kid appears. Or the first year of marriage a kid appears. Think about that? You haven't even got a chance to "sit down". You haven't even got to know your spouse on the level of wife yet and now you won't get that chance really. I believe that's where a lot of marriages fail.
Good discussion breh.
Agree with all of this and Im married so I would like to think my opinion has some sort of value
Most problems in marriage can be traced back to when the kids were born.