A bride was angry her African American friend didn't want to attend her wedding at a plantation, and people think she's in the wrong
Most recently, a 26-year-old woman is being criticized for the way she reacted to her African-American bridesmaid's decision to drop out of her plantation wedding, as she wrote in a since-deleted Reddit post. According to the bride-to-be, "all was well," until she announced the location to her bridal party, which is comprised of four of her "closest girlfriends," per a screenshot of the post that was shared by redditships on Twitter, which often highlights posts from the subreddit r/relationships.
But, according to the original writer, not everyone was thrilled about her decision to host her wedding at the "incredibly beautiful plantation," that she had "admired since I was a little girl." The bride said that two of her friends, who she identified as J and T, didn't seem as excited.
"I love you a lot but I have to bow out from being a bridesmaid," J began.
In her message, J said that when the bride-to-be started dating her now-fiancé two years ago, they began to discuss getting married at a plantation. But from the offset, the now-former bridesmaid says she brought her concerns to the bride.
"I told you then that I could not be a part of a wedding that happened at a plantation. I firmly believe that all plantations should be museums that highlight the atrocious injustices towards my community," J said. "We talked in great detail about exactly why I felt that way you told me that your love for me outweighed your desire to have a wedding at (plantation) and I wouldn't have to worry about it."
Shortly after announcing her decision, the original poster said she received a message from from J in which she withdrew from her bridal party.
In addition to this, J said appearing at a plantation wedding could harm her career.
"To be pictured and seen at a plantation wedding could cause harm to my professional reputation and, as much as I love you, I cannot make that sacrifice," said the 25-year-old.
Although J has bowed out of official duties, she still offered to pay for her half of her gown, be involved in the bridal shower, and attend the bachelorette party — if the bride will have her there.
"Please know that my issues with the chosen venue do not translate to issues with you and (financé). I love you both and I am so happy for the two you," J wrote. "He is the answer to so many prayers that I prayed over you when it comes to who you'll spend the rest of your life with."
In her since-deleted post, the 26-year-old turned to Reddit for help processing J's message.
"I remember us having that conversation, but I thought she was being overly sensitive and would change her mind when the actual wedding came around," she wrote. "And while I know her degrees are in African-American studies, I find it ridiculous that her colleagues would judge her for being in my wedding."
If you don't know, now you know
Even after she explained why she didn't want to attend, the cacling had to ask reddit for help processing this
Most recently, a 26-year-old woman is being criticized for the way she reacted to her African-American bridesmaid's decision to drop out of her plantation wedding, as she wrote in a since-deleted Reddit post. According to the bride-to-be, "all was well," until she announced the location to her bridal party, which is comprised of four of her "closest girlfriends," per a screenshot of the post that was shared by redditships on Twitter, which often highlights posts from the subreddit r/relationships.
But, according to the original writer, not everyone was thrilled about her decision to host her wedding at the "incredibly beautiful plantation," that she had "admired since I was a little girl." The bride said that two of her friends, who she identified as J and T, didn't seem as excited.
"I love you a lot but I have to bow out from being a bridesmaid," J began.
In her message, J said that when the bride-to-be started dating her now-fiancé two years ago, they began to discuss getting married at a plantation. But from the offset, the now-former bridesmaid says she brought her concerns to the bride.
"I told you then that I could not be a part of a wedding that happened at a plantation. I firmly believe that all plantations should be museums that highlight the atrocious injustices towards my community," J said. "We talked in great detail about exactly why I felt that way you told me that your love for me outweighed your desire to have a wedding at (plantation) and I wouldn't have to worry about it."
Shortly after announcing her decision, the original poster said she received a message from from J in which she withdrew from her bridal party.
In addition to this, J said appearing at a plantation wedding could harm her career.
"To be pictured and seen at a plantation wedding could cause harm to my professional reputation and, as much as I love you, I cannot make that sacrifice," said the 25-year-old.
Although J has bowed out of official duties, she still offered to pay for her half of her gown, be involved in the bridal shower, and attend the bachelorette party — if the bride will have her there.
"Please know that my issues with the chosen venue do not translate to issues with you and (financé). I love you both and I am so happy for the two you," J wrote. "He is the answer to so many prayers that I prayed over you when it comes to who you'll spend the rest of your life with."
In her since-deleted post, the 26-year-old turned to Reddit for help processing J's message.
"I remember us having that conversation, but I thought she was being overly sensitive and would change her mind when the actual wedding came around," she wrote. "And while I know her degrees are in African-American studies, I find it ridiculous that her colleagues would judge her for being in my wedding."
If you don't know, now you know
Even after she explained why she didn't want to attend, the cacling had to ask reddit for help processing this
Last edited:
'friends'
some things are not worth trying to explain to white people.
