I'm about to leave home again, for good this time. I'll have my CDL soon and it came with perfect timing. I'm going crazy in my surroundings. I love my family but for whatever reason I was born with a so called "eccentric" way of thinking. I can see into the future and its so bleak that it'll drive a sane person mad. I think about things and can see things that most people ignore. I can see the results after all of our elders die and were left in a cut throat racist city with no resources . The next step is for us to be sterilized.
Buffalo NY is a cold city literally and figuratively . The city of cold hearts and broken dreams. A place were you're welcomed with frowns from your own people and looks of fear from white people. Living among the hopeless and lost, trying to maintain some sort of integrity around people that sold theirs for a few materialistic goods.
I tried to hold out and live my dream as an artist but I slowly figured out that my "dream" was in fact a dream. I learned about nepotism and how people keep contracts, opportunities in their own circle. When I was young, silly me thought it was actually about talent, drive, hard work and passion for your craft. I never understood that society had no use for a black man and that it was practically illegal to step outside. It's all good tho, I accept it. Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me. I wont be fooled twice tho.
I'm dropping art and I'm about to try to become the best Truck driver I can be. I have an obsessive personality when it comes to mastering a skill, so ill put my same dedication into it that I did with art. I love art. I love the game but something about the creative industry that will suck your soul away. Networking is bullshyt unless u want to buy your way in or suck a dikk so its time to focus on a realistic career like trucking. Its perfect. I'll be alone, see the country for free and not have to deal with stupid nikkas or white supremacist all day.
My family isn't prepared for the upcoming hell were about to face. Somebody gotta get the money and build economic protection for whats sure to come. Time is ticking and were on the clock. I can't keep trying to reason with people, only to be seen as "crazy" its too late in the day. I can't build a business here because its simply too late in the day. I can't get damaged people to have a logical understanding of exactly how bad of a situation were in.
I can feel the pressure and hear the foot steps of the grim reaper creeping slowly, I gotta make a move. They don't understand my reasoning for the decisions I'm making but I have a vision of the dire consequences of being unprepared for war in a time of peace.
I plan on cutting communication off totally from certain family members on my dad side like my bedwench c*nt cousin that showed her snake ass wanna be Huxtable father my videos. Then he used them to take a jab at my pops who I indirectly took well deserved shots at. But my dad lack of accountability for his past transgressions have to catch up with him eventually. I think they call it "Karma" or something like that.
If she wasn't invited to look at them, obviously they weren't for her. The videos are made for like minded people. Shes a sneak tho, but I would expect nothing less from a person that got life handed to them. I hope she keep sticking to her dreams of finding her rich handsome California white man only for her to discover that he doesn't exist and she her dad funds run out and she finally have to build from the ground up like her "crazy" nikka cousin. We'll see if she is who she think she is in that day.
I'm also cutting off my other 2 cousins covered in visible tattoos. I don't have a problem with them. But their tattoos show a lack of judgement and that's detrimental to my survival. I'm cutting off anybody that have multiple kids and unmarried, visible tattoos or that listen to trap music because those nikkas are finished and I can die on the cold snowy pavement with them
I found out on Facebook that somebody that might've been my cousin was killed for his Balenciaga sneakers in 2018. I guess its time to leave for good. Its hard to leave and totally ignore my family existence but for my own sanity I have to. They have a unprogressive thought process with will lead to our extinction.
I also done with the whole pro black bullshyt. All it does is make me angry and make me hate. Not all white folks are bad anyway. My new goal is to find like minded people and be happy, even if they are non black...so what. I love my people but made peace that my ideal of a functional black society is simply isn't possible. But why should we be unhappy? us so called conscious people did enough. save yourself before its too late. Plus non blacks have the opportunities and resources. If you have a talent or economic value. Just play the role and fit in. That's all you can do .
I already decided to only smile, nod and get as far away from them as possible. I'm just going to live like a monk basically. Drive my truck, be on time, avoid accidents and only spend money on food. Once I save enough I can travel the world.
My uncle already did it. He packed up his bookbag and went to southern California and never looked back. That's what I plan on doing. Just pack my backpack and go to trucking school and never look back again. I want a new identity. I want to dress different, speak different and become somebody new... like the Men In Black came to my door and flashed the beam in my face.
I want to see the world before I die. Trucking will give me the money to take vacations. I just want to see places I wasn't supposed to see. I remember in school when our teachers told us we would be failures, dead or in jail as a kid in school #38. They were right sadly. But it wasn't all our fault. We was just trying to make sense out of a world where we didn't belong.
I'll be back in the future to post again. Its been a fun week. But time for another hiatus. Then I'll comeback for a another 7 day period. Peace to the brothers and a middle finger to the haters.
4/15/18
5:37 PM
Eastern Time
Buffalo NY is a cold city literally and figuratively . The city of cold hearts and broken dreams. A place were you're welcomed with frowns from your own people and looks of fear from white people. Living among the hopeless and lost, trying to maintain some sort of integrity around people that sold theirs for a few materialistic goods.
I tried to hold out and live my dream as an artist but I slowly figured out that my "dream" was in fact a dream. I learned about nepotism and how people keep contracts, opportunities in their own circle. When I was young, silly me thought it was actually about talent, drive, hard work and passion for your craft. I never understood that society had no use for a black man and that it was practically illegal to step outside. It's all good tho, I accept it. Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me. I wont be fooled twice tho.
I'm dropping art and I'm about to try to become the best Truck driver I can be. I have an obsessive personality when it comes to mastering a skill, so ill put my same dedication into it that I did with art. I love art. I love the game but something about the creative industry that will suck your soul away. Networking is bullshyt unless u want to buy your way in or suck a dikk so its time to focus on a realistic career like trucking. Its perfect. I'll be alone, see the country for free and not have to deal with stupid nikkas or white supremacist all day.
My family isn't prepared for the upcoming hell were about to face. Somebody gotta get the money and build economic protection for whats sure to come. Time is ticking and were on the clock. I can't keep trying to reason with people, only to be seen as "crazy" its too late in the day. I can't build a business here because its simply too late in the day. I can't get damaged people to have a logical understanding of exactly how bad of a situation were in.
I can feel the pressure and hear the foot steps of the grim reaper creeping slowly, I gotta make a move. They don't understand my reasoning for the decisions I'm making but I have a vision of the dire consequences of being unprepared for war in a time of peace.
I plan on cutting communication off totally from certain family members on my dad side like my bedwench c*nt cousin that showed her snake ass wanna be Huxtable father my videos. Then he used them to take a jab at my pops who I indirectly took well deserved shots at. But my dad lack of accountability for his past transgressions have to catch up with him eventually. I think they call it "Karma" or something like that.
If she wasn't invited to look at them, obviously they weren't for her. The videos are made for like minded people. Shes a sneak tho, but I would expect nothing less from a person that got life handed to them. I hope she keep sticking to her dreams of finding her rich handsome California white man only for her to discover that he doesn't exist and she her dad funds run out and she finally have to build from the ground up like her "crazy" nikka cousin. We'll see if she is who she think she is in that day.
I'm also cutting off my other 2 cousins covered in visible tattoos. I don't have a problem with them. But their tattoos show a lack of judgement and that's detrimental to my survival. I'm cutting off anybody that have multiple kids and unmarried, visible tattoos or that listen to trap music because those nikkas are finished and I can die on the cold snowy pavement with them
I found out on Facebook that somebody that might've been my cousin was killed for his Balenciaga sneakers in 2018. I guess its time to leave for good. Its hard to leave and totally ignore my family existence but for my own sanity I have to. They have a unprogressive thought process with will lead to our extinction.
I also done with the whole pro black bullshyt. All it does is make me angry and make me hate. Not all white folks are bad anyway. My new goal is to find like minded people and be happy, even if they are non black...so what. I love my people but made peace that my ideal of a functional black society is simply isn't possible. But why should we be unhappy? us so called conscious people did enough. save yourself before its too late. Plus non blacks have the opportunities and resources. If you have a talent or economic value. Just play the role and fit in. That's all you can do .
I already decided to only smile, nod and get as far away from them as possible. I'm just going to live like a monk basically. Drive my truck, be on time, avoid accidents and only spend money on food. Once I save enough I can travel the world.
My uncle already did it. He packed up his bookbag and went to southern California and never looked back. That's what I plan on doing. Just pack my backpack and go to trucking school and never look back again. I want a new identity. I want to dress different, speak different and become somebody new... like the Men In Black came to my door and flashed the beam in my face.
I want to see the world before I die. Trucking will give me the money to take vacations. I just want to see places I wasn't supposed to see. I remember in school when our teachers told us we would be failures, dead or in jail as a kid in school #38. They were right sadly. But it wasn't all our fault. We was just trying to make sense out of a world where we didn't belong.
I'll be back in the future to post again. Its been a fun week. But time for another hiatus. Then I'll comeback for a another 7 day period. Peace to the brothers and a middle finger to the haters.
4/15/18
5:37 PM
Eastern Time
Last edited:
at the responses in here
