Clapsteel O'Neal
put a red dot on your head like a hindu
you see platini hit the when the topic of racism came up
Now its nearly a proper Mourinho team
And finally, you're the latest in a long line of high-profile African players at Chelsea. How much would you like to emulate the achievements of those who have gone before you?
Eto'o: I know all of them. It's a great honour first of all to know African players have represented the continent so well here, and thanks to their good work previously and now, it is perhaps a reason why Jose thought he could bring me here and have similar success.
you see platini hit the when the topic of racism came up
Hello Samuel, how are you?
[Curtly] Hello.
[In a bid to thaw his frosty demeanour] Congratulations on your Champions League win last season.
[Takes out his mobile phone and begins writing a text message] Thanks.
Are you the best striker in the world?
[Still texting] I don't know. I just know that I play football and some people think I do it well.
At what age did you realise you were good enough to make a career out of it?
I always knew that.
Even when you were knee-high to an indomitable lion?
There was never any doubt.
What's the last CD you bought?
Something by Koffi Olomide.
Ah yes, the Congolese king of soukous, so do you dance the ndombolo?
[Smiles for first time] Yes, that's it!
What's your favourite TV show?
Le droit de savoir. It's a French programme featuring documentaries and investigations.
Cheese or chocolate?
[Smile fades, look of total ennui returns] Whatever.
That's just a loveably offbeat way of establishing what you like to eat ...
Arroz a la Cubana. Rice, tomato sauce, fried eggs and fried bananas.
And your favourite poison?
Water.
If Small Talk were to go to Cameroon on holiday, what's the one thing it should see or do?
Go to the North. It's very beautiful and has a great atmosphere.
What would you put into Room 101?
Diseases. All of them.
Who'd win a fight between a lion and a tiger?
[Looks at Small Talk with a mixture of pity and contempt]
Maybe you could make some wisecrack about lions being indomitable?
I don't think so.
Who's your best friend in football?
Geremi Njitap.
A Chelsea player! So is all this talk of a bitter rivalry between the two clubs unfounded?
I don't know.
You don't take greater pleasure sticking one over Jose Mourinho and Didier Drogba than other people?
I don't know.
You're not really enjoying this chat, are you?
[Wearily] Any more questions?
It's traditional to finish by asking the interviewee to tell a joke ... but there's probably not much point on this occasion, is there?
No.
Bye Samuel, it's been wonderful.
[Relieved] Bye.
Meh, you guys might not even qualify anyway. Potential playoff against France or Portugual
billy mcneill braindead brehs
billy mcneill braindead brehs