Essential The Locker Room's Random Thoughts
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SeveroDrgnfli
Ain't nobody tryin to get indicted.
B and I spend a lot of time together. We've spent everyday together since our first date. She told me we're not dating and we're never going to have sex because I'm too young for her and I'm in a different place in my life. We went on date and we had sex the next day. Our first date was group yoga, our second date was a cuddle session, our third date we went to the farmers' market and I made her dinner, and yesterday we hung out all day. I just got home from her place. She wanted to give me a house key this AM.
I've never felt this close to anyone before. She takes care of my body when I'm in pain and she doesn't allow me to have a bad attitude. Through her I'm learning more about myself. It feels like we've been together for years. We spend more time naked cuddling than we do having sex. We both have ADHD, because of that our brains are similar which makes interacting easy.
She told me growing up around white men fukked me up and I agree. Constantly competing with them fukked my self image and self esteem up. She told me the language I use is colonial language. I talk about domination, exploitation, and competition a lot. She said that's the white man in me, and I agree. I am not that kind of person, but I've been told I have to think that way my whole life because I spent my developmental years around rich white people.
Thing is I ain't white and I aint rich. I'm going to stop that shyt because I feel guilty all the time for being that kind of person because it's contributed to my success. Life isn't about success life is about health and happiness. I've made a lot of money and bought everything I've ever desired. I've dated beautiful women, owned a business, excelled at sports, owned my dream car, lived in my dream home, and was depressed while having it. I always wanted more and I didn't know why. I knew I had to keep acquiring things because the people around me had everything.
Giving it up and getting a normal job has made me happier than all of those things. Happier being the key, not happy, happier. I've never been happy honestly, to survive I had to become a savage and I don't need to be hard as fukk all the time. It's time for me to really heal and really grow. It's not about money, being skinny, having nice shyt, or even being liked, to me it's about being healthy moving forward.
Three things I enjoy about her:
A) I sleep better when she's next to me because I feel safe.
B) She confirms I'm not crazy and I am exceptional at reading people. I'm 100% right about everyone at all times. Everybody has a pattern. I'm quite good at noticing patterns and predicting how people will respond.
C) She's honest and asks me, "who takes care of you and who cares about you."
I'm not going to discuss our relationship with anyone because I know people look for bad things. They don't want me to be happy or successful so they'll say things like, "why would a doctor want to date you? You're not on her level so she wants something from you." "She's probably seeing other guys too." "Enjoy it while it lasts."
I think people like when I'm down because I can't be up if I'm down. When I'm up I'm unstoppable. I've been down for so long and I've still accomplished a life time's worth of things. I'm 27. I have at least 9-15 years to make moves. I'm done making moves. I'm going to slow down my life and mind, focus on knowing myself, and healing myself.
I can't keep running from myself and hiding behind accomplishments of white men. What I value can't be purchased because it's not a product of man. It's God given.
I've never felt this close to anyone before. She takes care of my body when I'm in pain and she doesn't allow me to have a bad attitude. Through her I'm learning more about myself. It feels like we've been together for years. We spend more time naked cuddling than we do having sex. We both have ADHD, because of that our brains are similar which makes interacting easy.
She says we're not dating
She told me growing up around white men fukked me up and I agree. Constantly competing with them fukked my self image and self esteem up. She told me the language I use is colonial language. I talk about domination, exploitation, and competition a lot. She said that's the white man in me, and I agree. I am not that kind of person, but I've been told I have to think that way my whole life because I spent my developmental years around rich white people.
Thing is I ain't white and I aint rich. I'm going to stop that shyt because I feel guilty all the time for being that kind of person because it's contributed to my success. Life isn't about success life is about health and happiness. I've made a lot of money and bought everything I've ever desired. I've dated beautiful women, owned a business, excelled at sports, owned my dream car, lived in my dream home, and was depressed while having it. I always wanted more and I didn't know why. I knew I had to keep acquiring things because the people around me had everything.
Giving it up and getting a normal job has made me happier than all of those things. Happier being the key, not happy, happier. I've never been happy honestly, to survive I had to become a savage and I don't need to be hard as fukk all the time. It's time for me to really heal and really grow. It's not about money, being skinny, having nice shyt, or even being liked, to me it's about being healthy moving forward.
Three things I enjoy about her:
A) I sleep better when she's next to me because I feel safe.
B) She confirms I'm not crazy and I am exceptional at reading people. I'm 100% right about everyone at all times. Everybody has a pattern. I'm quite good at noticing patterns and predicting how people will respond.
C) She's honest and asks me, "who takes care of you and who cares about you."
I'm not going to discuss our relationship with anyone because I know people look for bad things. They don't want me to be happy or successful so they'll say things like, "why would a doctor want to date you? You're not on her level so she wants something from you." "She's probably seeing other guys too." "Enjoy it while it lasts."
I think people like when I'm down because I can't be up if I'm down. When I'm up I'm unstoppable. I've been down for so long and I've still accomplished a life time's worth of things. I'm 27. I have at least 9-15 years to make moves. I'm done making moves. I'm going to slow down my life and mind, focus on knowing myself, and healing myself.
I can't keep running from myself and hiding behind accomplishments of white men. What I value can't be purchased because it's not a product of man. It's God given.
I waited two years for her and I'd wait two life times for her
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Oceanicpuppy
Superstar
I can say when people are attractive just like he can say when people are attractive.Yea that's right you clean that up ma'am
I gotchu haji
It's not that bad.
I was about to snitch my ass off just now
Oceanicpuppy
Superstar
She looks awkward doing that, no shade
The Odum of Ala Igbo
Hail Biafra!
Some Nigerian dude comes up to me asking is ******* my real name and what my name means?
I'm like yes it is my real name.
He said ," it isn't short for **********?
I'm like no.
Then he explains to me in Nigeria the names explain where a person is from in Nigeria.
He said he was from the Southeast.
Interesting. Maybe he thought I was apart of his people or some rival nation/tribe?
@thewave, @MansaMusa, @Sagat and coli Nigerians what was he trying to say?
Maybe your name sounds Igbo?
Tenchi Ryu
Ashtray B!tch
He don't do that, he's innocentI can say when people are attractive just like he can say when people are attractive.
Oceanicpuppy
Superstar
He don't do that, he's innocent
Its ok. He thinks Ashley Banks ( not the poster) is beautiful.
She is.
Oceanicpuppy
Superstar
Now playing.