I thought this thread was gonna be funny 

That's what I came in to read2009 August
me and my breh from high school decided to catch up cause we ain't see each other in a hot minute.
I was bumping nothing but Drake at the time (him and Gucci was all I listened to from '09-10) and he was really into them XXL, rappers-rapper types.
so we decide to hit up a local hole in the wall spot in the town next over, catch up and talk to some girls
we blasting music all the way there, talking shyt, trying to holler at girls in they car etc young breh shyt
we pull up in the club and we lowkey the freshest ones there.
Then we see this one guy there, kinda awkward looking, and dressed bummy as hell. yellowish looking ones, pants that needed a little ironing and a shirt with a stretched out neck.
so we get to making a scene, doing the "head ass, looking ass" chit we do up here. we gunned the fukk outta homie in front of everybody, and his comebacks was trashed and we could tell breh was getting heated af, so he bounced
then we get to talking to these two girls that was there, baddies not from the area, my boy did the talking and i kinda eased my way into the convo and ended up getting the girl I peeped to laugh and really had fun talking to her.
so we get ready to go dancing and the breh from earlier we was heating tried to bum rush me away from shorty, I had to shove the breh out the way hit him with theand he just staring at her looking straight
going "oh for real?"
and we BOTH had to explain to breh just cause shorty danced on you (obviously out of pitty) don't really mean shyt like that...except for me and my mansso buddy walks away shaking.
had a couple of drinks, exchanging numbers, facebook etc. they said they were bout to hit up a friends spot nearby and we should come thru.
me and my mans wait a bit after they leave , when we did that air hit us and was just feeling good and faded af.
we hop in my boys car and get to rolling us one, and we geeked cus lowkey these girls was a bit out of our league
but then my side of the door swings open and the breh who we made fun of earlier, punches the shyt out of me , I get out the car ready to throw hands but his buddy runs a bit in the middle of the parking lot, and he's with at least four of his guys with him.
So now me and my mans standing in this parking lot arguing back and forth calling him all kinds of bytches, lame, broke, fukkboy etc. and his little clique trying to get us to throw hands.
so buddy gets the biggest dude in his group to fight me and I say "you a straight bytch, you need another nikka to fight for you."
then them nikkas just flat out charged us brehs
i got a few hits in but when I say they beat the breaks off of us boy, we managed to push them off of us, and they bounced, the lame nikka with the stretched out shirt was hollering "
ON GD we just whooped them nikkas on GD!" which is funny cuz I was a GD but I cut all that shyt after high school.
so me and my mans in the car straightand we start driving to the spot, we get there, hop out and as we walk up to the apartment building they was at my mans hit me with the "tell em we won." cuz we was had a few scrapes, torn shirts, busted lip etc.
and best believe later that night, after shorty talking my ears off about being a nurse, got all up in them guts.
Lets hear that Near Death ExperienceWhat y’all nikkas wanna readI got a near death experiences, I got ones of getting laid and I got tragedies
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Ok one time I was at a broads 25th bday party and we all went to the lake. It was me 2 hoes and a Mexican there’s life guards and the whole shyt there so I’m feeling secure because even though I like the water nikkas can’t swim all like thatL
Lets hear that Near Death Experience![]()