I promise I didn't abandon this thread after posting. Just had our son's first school concert and a family dinner after.
So, there actually is a lot of communication between her and I. I mean, I know literally everything she does when she goes out. We also spend a majority of our time together. I work at a high school, so I get out at 2:20 every day that I work and I'm at home four months a year basically. We do nine weeks on, two weeks off and then a two month summer.
As I mentioned before, the kids are young. They're honestly in bed no later than 6:30 to 7 most nights. I don't mind being home with them while she's out.
Our sex life isn't bad or anything. It's improved if anything over the last month and a half (first partner was only on 10/22/22). We've always had a lot of sex, but a problem I know that we have is that I really don't initiate our encounters most of the time. I'm also not a dominant partner. I don't like taking charge of well, most things in life. Like, she wants me, if I'm in the mood, to wake her up in the middle of the night and use her body. She kind of wants to be dragged across the bed and whatnot. Just not things I'm totally comfortable with.
If anything, she doesn't seem entirely satisfied with the partners she's had so far, which is disappointing to me, in a weird way. Like, I actually do want someone to pick up the slack there.
The thing I don't like most is that she can't really articulate what she wants most out of the whole thing. I know she likes the attention of somebody always texting her and telling her how pretty she is, but like, I could look at her phone and she is having the exact conversation with like four different people at once. There's very little variation.
I also know that she is looking for companionship or friendship of a sort. She doesn't really have any friends at all. She's tried multiple mom's groups and the like, but always ends up leaving them behind because she just can't connect with anyone in them.
Also, as far as the job thing, she could literally replace me and I'd have no problem with it. We have the same basic qualifications. I don't mind being the at home parent.
Also, I don't believe she would have any problem with me going out. I'm just not as interested in it, I suppose. I'm not even lacking in opportunities. Hell, just having a connected dating profile has people messaging me through her.
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Honestly, my biggest struggle is that I'm not really sure what role I play in her life. Like, what makes our relationship any different from any other relationship she makes?