BigE214
Future GOAT
Remembers being king of "Instances your swag let you down thread" on SOHH
Post your biggest/most embarassing L with a female
- Thread starter ChrisDorner
- Start date
Inevitable Kobe Turnover
Banned
too many 1. 11th grade. Bad ass cheerleader I was always cool with but she had a boyfriend(loose affiliate)..
Anyways after school I was always at her house grubbin out, bullshytin just on some friend shyt. She had been dating dude for 2 years now. He used to always cheat but I never snitched on dude. Well they broke up for a bit. I made my move! We went out to a party together. Everyone was :ohh: when we walked in. I thought I was in there.
..Had a couple of drinks, danced, when I was taking her home I saw she got a couple of texts. 
It was her ex..I dropped her off and saw her get in her car. She was going to see him. They were back together the next day 
Was at a movie with her, she dipped to the bathroom right quick, but was gone the rest of the movie.
Saw her outside on the payphone with another nikka
thats foul
Smoking With Cigarettes
Superstar
I'll never forget this...cuz it kinda molded me into the nikka I am today.
The year was 2004...I was about 15. I had just gotten a cell phone. It was a little T-Mobile prepaid flip joint. I got this girl's number, and I'm texting her and what not, she lol'ing and shyt like everything good. Then one day I texted her, and she just flipped the fukk out on me son. She hit me with some shyt like "YOU DOING TOO MUCH, JUST LEAVE ME ALONE" and I'm just sitting there like" then finally I just never texted her again. It had me in the fukk bytches mindset for madd long, actually until about 2010-2011.
Fast forward several years to I think 2009, I was a freshman in college, I see her she's working in a department store. We exchange numbers, and she hits me up and we talk for a little bit. And this bytch had the audacity to say "Why we stop talking back then"but I keep it cool, cause in my mind I was already planning out how I could dog her out as bad as I could. Long story short, we actually dated for awhile, then it ended.
Moral of the story: You always gotta fukk the bytches that turned you down when y'all were younger.
IT WAS BAD ENOUGH SHE LEFT ME TO SUFFER THE 3RD ACT OF THE NUTTY PROFESSOR ON MY OWN
Inevitable Kobe Turnover
Banned
7th grade I got my first action. Sucked on some titties at a party. I had no idea what I was doing but I knew I was in there. She was a freshman in highschool too 
...We ended up on the back porch of a house that was for sale. She reached her hands down my pants and jerked me off. I had no idea what happened but it felt so good. 
..She knew I came and asked if I had a condom ..I didn't...We walked back to the party. All my potnas was looking at me with the 
cause I was extra relaxed.
About two hours later she told me to come upstairs...
..I followed. We ended up in a bedroom making out and I thought she was gonna just let me smash raw. About ten minutes in I hear my name downstairs. It was a chick I was semi-talking to I also didn't want my face out there with a known skank. Looking back none of that shyt matters. 
bad...I got her number and went downstairs to join the rest of the party..Anyways after that I kind of told my potnas I hit..
Word got back to chick and she wanted nothing to do with me.
...We ended up on the back porch of a house that was for sale. She reached her hands down my pants and jerked me off. I had no idea what happened but it felt so good. ..She knew I came and asked if I had a condom ..I didn't...We walked back to the party. All my potnas was looking at me with the cause I was extra relaxed.About two hours later she told me to come upstairs...
..I followed. We ended up in a bedroom making out and I thought she was gonna just let me smash raw. About ten minutes in I hear my name downstairs. It was a chick I was semi-talking to I also didn't want my face out there with a known skank. Looking back none of that shyt matters. bad...I got her number and went downstairs to join the rest of the party..Anyways after that I kind of told my potnas I hit.. Word got back to chick and she wanted nothing to do with me. 
beenz
Rap Guerilla
I think I have told this story, but as a youngsta, I was sharing that girl
I mean, I found out cuz I came over her crib and found used condom wrappers behind the trash in the bathroom
I mean, I found out cuz I came over her crib and found used condom wrappers behind the trash in the bathroom
R.O. Double
Holdin My Balls Since 83
Did you call her your cinnamon apple?When i was in high school this girl recorded me spilling my heart out to her and simpn on the phone . . . . .and then she played it for all her homegirls and nggas who she was actually fckn . . . . . .
Inevitable Kobe Turnover
Banned
Me and my boy met these two girls out one night at a wine lounge. They were really cool and down to earth not to mention the area we were in was super ritzy. My PR boy took the white chick and I took the sista. She was visiting from college(MIT) 
decent face, super fatty, tight p*ssy..We end up at the sistas crib at like 2 in the morning. Her parents are up 
..I was shook out of my mind. It's like 2:30 in the morning and me and my boy are in this chick's house meeting her parents. 
I thought we were about to get shot.
They was hella cool though :ohh: We chopped it up for like 20 minutes before they headed to bed. We hit the hot tub outside. My boy took his chick to the pool. Chick started giving me head right in the hot tub ....I took off her bathing suit bottoms and slid that jawn in raw but I couldn't get a good feel because of the warm water and bubbles. I said let's go to her room. We went to her room and I couldn't get it up ...Between the alcohol, fear of her dad killin me and the overall excitement and shock my lil man wasn't cooperating. She said it wasn't a big deal and we went back outside to smoke hookah and have a glass. My boy smashed in the pool and was cheesing. We exchanged numbers..I hit her up a couple of times but she played ya boy. I would've wifed too.
decent face, super fatty, tight p*ssy..We end up at the sistas crib at like 2 in the morning. Her parents are up ..I was shook out of my mind. It's like 2:30 in the morning and me and my boy are in this chick's house meeting her parents. I thought we were about to get shot.They was hella cool though :ohh: We chopped it up for like 20 minutes before they headed to bed. We hit the hot tub outside. My boy took his chick to the pool. Chick started giving me head right in the hot tub
....I took off her bathing suit bottoms and slid that jawn in raw but I couldn't get a good feel because of the warm water and bubbles. I said let's go to her room. We went to her room and I couldn't get it up ...Between the alcohol, fear of her dad killin me and the overall excitement and shock my lil man wasn't cooperating. She said it wasn't a big deal and we went back outside to smoke hookah and have a glass. My boy smashed in the pool and was cheesing. We exchanged numbers..I hit her up a couple of times but she played ya boy. I would've wifed too.
I think I have told this story, but as a youngsta, I was sharing that girl
I mean, I found out cuz I came over her crib and found used condom wrappers behind the trash in the bathroom
Could've been somebody else's in the house tho
beenz
Rap Guerilla
when i was in college i had just broke up with my ex and moved back in the dorms
-i was fukking this chick who was in my 2nd level spanish class(she helped me cheat on test)
took her to the reservoir
she started sucking the dikk while we was in my car
as soon as i cum
this cop knocked on the window
told use that it is illegal to have sex in public
-he was just as embarrassed as we were
told us to leave
-the whole time ole girl was holding my cum in her mouf
as soon as the cop walked off
she spit all the cum back on me in my lap
shyt was all on the front of my jeans n shyt
------
the whole ride back i had the ac blowing on me trying to dry the wet spot
it was huge
the dorm i lived in was not co-ed
and there was this old ass former professor lady
at the front desk
i had to make Shinobi moves to get past her and everyone else to get to my room and change
-i was fukking this chick who was in my 2nd level spanish class(she helped me cheat on test)
took her to the reservoir
she started sucking the dikk while we was in my car
as soon as i cum
this cop knocked on the window
told use that it is illegal to have sex in public
-he was just as embarrassed as we were
told us to leave
-the whole time ole girl was holding my cum in her mouf
as soon as the cop walked off
she spit all the cum back on me in my lap
shyt was all on the front of my jeans n shyt
------
the whole ride back i had the ac blowing on me trying to dry the wet spot
it was huge
the dorm i lived in was not co-ed
and there was this old ass former professor lady
at the front desk
i had to make Shinobi moves to get past her and everyone else to get to my room and change
I didn't lose my V-card until my first year of college, so to be honest high school itself was probably a pretty big L when it came to women.
It wasn't so much that I failed at getting women (or even ever got rejected) as it was that I was too shy/afraid of rejection to even try.
Kinda sucked finding out years later that a chick liked you but you missed out because you were too scared to holla.
It wasn't so much that I failed at getting women (or even ever got rejected) as it was that I was too shy/afraid of rejection to even try.
Kinda sucked finding out years later that a chick liked you but you missed out because you were too scared to holla.