"Ladies and gentlemen, imagine that you are hard at work sending Truth Social posts out to your adoring worshipers day and night. It's such hard work, especially because the grease from the KFC, Chik-Fil-A, and McDonald's makes it hard to use the touch screen. Then, out of nowhere, a woman whose vagina you touched without her permission accuses you of touching her without her permission. I'm sure you can only imagine the stress you'd be under, trying to get this shrieking harpy to shut up for a second so that you can go back to completing your Burger King order on DoorDash. And that's why we deserve to win this case."