Official Jurassic World Thread

[BlackMajik]

Dinosaurs need to make a comeback in movies so yes I'm ready

 

[Poetical Poltergeist]

The kids were supposed to be annoying because of Sam Neill's character's distaste for kids that he vented about in the beginning of the film. The fact that they were so annoying made it much more comical and the movie better. I loved it. They weren't as bad as that black girl in The Lost World.

how in the hell did they make the movie better? never heard anyone say that before Lol..... The girl from lost world was bad too but those two little cacs were terrible.

 

[Uncle_Ruckus]

how in the hell did they make the movie better? never heard anyone say that before Lol..... The girl from lost world was bad too but those two little cacs were terrible.

If you didn't have annoying kids breh then there wouldn't be any comedy. The exchanges between the little boy and Sam Neill were funny. If you don't think so, then that's you. Also, when the T Rex showed up and they didn't know what to do and were flashing light in it's eyes, that scene was scary af for any kid to watch and probably gave some nightmares. What are you complaining about though? I think you just don't like kids. They did a great job, besides the girl hacking the computer system in less than a minute.

 

[Whitty Hutton]

Hopefully no annoying kids in this flick. the first JP is classic but those kids were the worst.

I seriously don't see that happening. You not having a summer blockbuster with accompanying merchandise centered around children's obsession and not have kids in the movie.

 

[Uncle_Ruckus]

I seriously don't see that happening. You not having a summer blockbuster with accompanying merchandise centered around children's obsession and not have kids in the movie.

This nikka is trippin breh.

 

[Poetical Poltergeist]

If you didn't have annoying kids breh then there wouldn't be any comedy. The exchanges between the little boy and Sam Neill were funny. If you don't think so, then that's you. Also, when the T Rex showed up and they didn't know what to do and were flashing light in it's eyes, that scene was scary af for any kid to watch and probably gave some nightmares. What are you complaining about though? I think you just don't like kids. They did a great job, besides the girl hacking the computer system in less than a minute.

Nah nikka, those kids sucked. so there cant be comedy without kids? Gtfoh. no hate bro i know.u passionate about film too but if JP has a weak link its those kids. and i have two kids so it has nothing to do with that.

 

[Poetical Poltergeist]

I seriously don't see that happening. You not having a summer blockbuster with accompanying merchandise centered around children's obsession and not have kids in the movie.

Of course kids will be in the movie einstein. but annoying kids that are in the majority of the film that u wish would get eaten is what im talking about.

 

[Uncle_Ruckus]

Nah nikka, those kids sucked. so there cant be comedy without kids? Gtfoh. no hate bro i know.u passionate about film too but if JP has a weak link its those kids. and i have two kids so it has nothing to do with that.

There wouldn't be much comedy breh. You think Jeff Goldblum could have carried the comedy for the whole movie by himself? What would you have done different? Should a known child actor like Macaulay Culkin have played the boy?

 

[Canada Goose]

Ohhhh I'm hype about this

I love the Jurassic Park movie franchise, I would love to see them put other prehistoric animals in addition to Dinosaurs in future JP movies, that would be dope

 

[Poetical Poltergeist]

So comedy is required and only children can provide it?

why do i feel this way? .this article i guess best sums it up.

Tim & Lex Murphy (Joseph Mazzello & Ariana Richards) – Jurassic Park (1993)

Tim and Lex Murphy

Finally we come to the nadir of the list, the Marianas Trench of terrible kid characters, the lowest of the low, the yardstick by which all other obnoxious, snot-nosed, smart-mouthed children in movies are measured. Moral know-it-alls, crybabies, attempted murder played for laughs, even the character that nearly ruined what is possibly my favorite movie of all time (Star Wars) – none of these were dire enough to be found worthy as the worst “kid” character ever. Or, as is the case, characters. I present to you THE WORST KIDS in movie history: Tim & Lex Hammond, the brother and sister duo from Jurassic Park.

One of the ways that an observer can tell that a character’s actions are properly matching its story’s tone is to put oneself in the movie. Ask yourself – “If I was in this situation, would I behave in a way that is similar to the way these characters are behaving? Or, at the very least, do I understand why they are behaving like they are?” Tim and Lex not only fail this test, but fail it miserably. They are all of the other seven entries’ worst traits rolled into one. Depending on what part of the film you are watching, they are either monumentally stupid or incomparable geniuses, either precociously self-aware or oblivious to everything happening around them, either failing to avoid trouble or almost consciously and purposefully looking for trouble. The characters suffer from that most terrible of screenwriting shortcomings – their decision-making abilities change at the convenience of the script.

As grandchildren of Jurassic Park’s founder and curator John Hammond, Tim and Lex arrive at the park’s far-flung island acting as if the entirety of its park and inhabitants is there for their own personal amusement. This is never more obvious than when they first encounter Sam Neill’s paleontologist character of Alan Grant. Tim rattles off increasingly-irritating questions at Alan before Alan finally snaps in a famous passive-aggressive moment. The scene is theoretically supposed to show Alan’s hardbitten, takes-no-crap-from-people personality, but instead ends up focusing the instinctive desire of everyone watching the movie towards hoping that Alan just punches Tim square in the face. To make the initial interactions between Alan, Tim, and Lex awkward and tense creates opportunities for character development later on. Except that Tim and Lex don’t develop. As in previous entries (see War of the Worlds), the adult finds himself constantly saving the imbecilic children from themselves.

While the characters and audience alike explore Jurassic Park, Tim and Lex’s eccentricities (i.e. stupid decisions) are mere brief sidetracks. When the dinosaurs escape and begin marauding throughout the park, their decisions and actions put people’s lives in direct danger and fly in the face of rationality. Kids can make some dumb decisions sometimes, but do any of them really make decisions THIS DUMB???

When faced with a loose Tyrannosaurus Rex sniffing around the car she is riding in, does Lexi shut off her million-watt flashlight so as to not attract attention? No, she actually shines it in his eye.

When told that the extremely loud klaxons signify that electricity will, in a matter of seconds, again be running through the previously-disabled electric fence that he is climbing on, does Tim hurry to get off the fence before he is fried? No, he stupidly stands on the highest rung, muttering something about his fear of heights. Seconds later, the newly-restored electricity “helps” him off the fence by blasting him 40 feet across the jungle.

Upon narrowly escaping death and with several carnivorous dinosaurs still on the loose, do the children decide to find a safe place to hide until rescue comes, preferably behind a strong locked door of some sort? No, they decide that they are hungry, so their next decision is to hobble over to the spacious, open-air cafeteria for some food, whereby they are quickly attacked by two velociraptors.

Amidst all of these poor choices, the characters’ realism takes another hit by their random and uncharacteristic flashes of brilliance that would make Einstein do a double-take. After being shocked half to death, Tim somehow manages to avoid attacks by the aforementioned pair of lightning-fast velociraptors by the clever use of kitchen utensils and cabinets. Even worse, and in what is probably the most egregiously-stupid scene of the entire film, the park’s command center has been left unprotected by the security system’s power grid, the head analyst (Samuel L. “Hold on to your butts” Jackson) is dead, and things look grim. Enter Lex, a self-described “computer hacker”, who in a matter of seconds breaks into the system and restores power, creating a temporary respite from the man-eaters outside. As you are assumedly reading this article on a computer, you already know how insulting and absurd such a scene is, and yet there it is on celluloid. Not only is it possibly the most excruciatingly-painful “kid saving the day” scene ever, but the smartest hacker in the real world couldn’t hope to complete that task in the allotted time on his or her best day.

Lex and Tim are the worst kid characters ever for a variety of reasons all rolled into one perfect storm of suckery. Their precociousness does not translate to intelligence, except for random times when their stupidity suddenly morphs into inconceivable inventiveness at a moment’s notice. Useful advice from the surrounding adults like “shut the flashlight off” or “get off the fence” go unnoticed by the children, who, although they are clearly wrong to ignore what the adults say, suffer little to no consequences as a result. The screenwriters were certainly no help either - apparently not content with allowing Tim and Lex to defy reality and cheat death on multiple occasions on an island crawling with bloodthirsty dinosaurs, they aggravatingly instilled in Lex the presence of mind to save a variety of intelligent adults who hold a variety of doctorates by pretending to be able to “hack” a sophisticated security grid in a matter of seconds.

Adults are dying all around them. Computer analysts are killed, the scum-sucking lawyer is eaten, and the expert hunter is out-hunted by a pair of raptors. And yet the kids live on, a spit in the face of sensibility. There have been many bothersome child characters throughout film, from Max Reede to Anakin Skywalker, but Lex and Tim Hammond are the worst. Ever.

 

[RJY33]

Dying for the trailer. What happened to putting out teasers a year to a year+ before a big movie is out? I remember seeing teasers for Independence Day, Jurassic Park 2, etc. the summer beforehand. We got Jurassic Park 4, terminator 5, star wars 7, avengers 2 all next year and no preview for any of em

 

[Whitty Hutton]

Of course kids will be in the movie einstein. but annoying kids that are in the majority of the film that u wish would get eaten is what im talking about.

I don't see what was annoying about those kids that made them different from kids in any other action/horror flick, including the other 2 JP's
Were you a grown azz man when you first saw it? Because I don't think too many of us as kids were seeing the movie like "man these kids are annoying"

Yeah I wanted the girl murked for being a fool with the flashlight with the T-Rex outside the Jeep lol, but she wasn't a real detraction

 

[Sad Bunny]

First day cop

Bae is starring in this

 

[Poetical Poltergeist]

I don't see what was annoying about those kids that made them different from kids in any other action/horror flick, including the other 2 JP's
Were you a grown azz man when you first saw it? Because I don't think too many of us as kids were seeing the movie like "man these kids are annoying"

Yeah I wanted the girl murked for being a fool with the flashlight with the T-Rex outside the Jeep lol, but she wasn't a real detraction

my hate for those kids were more noticeable as i got older but i was annoyed by them the first time i watched it . i was 12 at the time.
if u search the net u will find many people who hated those kids too lol...im done posting about that

JP Worlds

 

[Swagnificent]

They better use animatronics and not all cgi

CGI is prolly good enough now that it would shyt on the animatronics from the first movie.