FistofJustice
Pro
Hello everyone. I feel trapped and ashamed and can't really discuss this with my friends or family so hopefully you guys can give me some clarity. I have been dating a guy "Kane" for 1 year. We met at a concert and immediately hit it off. He is white from Denmark but has lived in America for about 10 years and I am African American. You will see why this is relevant in a second.
I lost my job about three months into us dating and ended up moving in with him and he essentially takes care of everything and is happy to do so. He suggested I go back to school to finish my Masters (I had to drop out of my MA program a few years ago because of money issues) on his dime which I eagerly accepted and now I am only two semesters (summer and fall) away from finishing my program.
The problem is that when we started having sex, he told me he liked submissive women which is fine because I am very submissive in bed. However, the third time we had sex, he started using racial slurs against me like "n***er bytch" and "c00n whore" and saying things like "if only your worthless slave ancestors could see you being degraded by a superior white man now", etc. I told him that I wasn't comfortable with him saying those things and he told me it was only raceplay which is a form of BDSM and I shouldn't take it seriously because he isn't a racist.
Outside of the bedroom he is a really nice guy and we do a lot of stuff together but when it comes to sex, he says the only way he can get off is to use racial slurs against me because that's what turns him on. He will also take pictures of black girls that he sees walking down the street or at the mall and caption them with things like "how does this n***er whore look?" and other vile things.
I have looked into Raceplay BDSM and saw it was a real thing but I just can't get comfortable with it and whenever I bring it up he ignores me and tells me I am overreacting and that he can't possibly be a racist since he's in love with a black woman.
It has started progressing outside of the bedroom now and he will text me or call me during the day when he's at work and ask me things like "how is my sexy ni**er bytch today?". Honestly I have heard the N-word more from him in the past year than I have in my whole 32 yrs of life.
I am conflicted because I do like him a lot but I am not comfortable with this raceplay aspect of our relationship because it is very one sided and I was never consulted to even check if I was ok with it! Sometimes I think I can deal with it because I am 32 and the clock is ticking but then again, I feel like I am being a race traitor by letting this man racially degrade me when we are intimate. I am just really confused. Part of me wants to wait to finish my Masters then leave him but I am not sure if he might try and sue me or something. Advice?
tl;dr: My boyfriend uses racial slurs like the N word during sex and it has now progressed outside of the bedroom. He calls it "raceplay" but I am not into it at all. Not sure if I should leave him.
My boyfriend (45M) uses racial slurs during sex with me (32F) and I'm not sure what to do about it. • /r/relationships
OMG I cannot believe cannot believe how little self worth people have! It makes me scared to have children.
I lost my job about three months into us dating and ended up moving in with him and he essentially takes care of everything and is happy to do so. He suggested I go back to school to finish my Masters (I had to drop out of my MA program a few years ago because of money issues) on his dime which I eagerly accepted and now I am only two semesters (summer and fall) away from finishing my program.
The problem is that when we started having sex, he told me he liked submissive women which is fine because I am very submissive in bed. However, the third time we had sex, he started using racial slurs against me like "n***er bytch" and "c00n whore" and saying things like "if only your worthless slave ancestors could see you being degraded by a superior white man now", etc. I told him that I wasn't comfortable with him saying those things and he told me it was only raceplay which is a form of BDSM and I shouldn't take it seriously because he isn't a racist.
Outside of the bedroom he is a really nice guy and we do a lot of stuff together but when it comes to sex, he says the only way he can get off is to use racial slurs against me because that's what turns him on. He will also take pictures of black girls that he sees walking down the street or at the mall and caption them with things like "how does this n***er whore look?" and other vile things.
I have looked into Raceplay BDSM and saw it was a real thing but I just can't get comfortable with it and whenever I bring it up he ignores me and tells me I am overreacting and that he can't possibly be a racist since he's in love with a black woman.
It has started progressing outside of the bedroom now and he will text me or call me during the day when he's at work and ask me things like "how is my sexy ni**er bytch today?". Honestly I have heard the N-word more from him in the past year than I have in my whole 32 yrs of life.
I am conflicted because I do like him a lot but I am not comfortable with this raceplay aspect of our relationship because it is very one sided and I was never consulted to even check if I was ok with it! Sometimes I think I can deal with it because I am 32 and the clock is ticking but then again, I feel like I am being a race traitor by letting this man racially degrade me when we are intimate. I am just really confused. Part of me wants to wait to finish my Masters then leave him but I am not sure if he might try and sue me or something. Advice?
tl;dr: My boyfriend uses racial slurs like the N word during sex and it has now progressed outside of the bedroom. He calls it "raceplay" but I am not into it at all. Not sure if I should leave him.
My boyfriend (45M) uses racial slurs during sex with me (32F) and I'm not sure what to do about it. • /r/relationships
OMG I cannot believe cannot believe how little self worth people have! It makes me scared to have children.
that this is what nice guys are to brehettes
she can gon with this bullshyt.
I swear once rep come back I'm negging her to 8 levels of hell on reddit. 
wenches being wenches
don't give a fukk