Long distance relationships

The ADD

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i used to be more optimistic about them, but unless yall sit down and decide what is and isn't ok, i don't think i've seen a LDR where both parties were 100% faithful. and even beyond that, yall don't develop together while living apart, everything is a report about you life, yall don't experience life together

That's why you are running from me :dwillhuh:
 

Prodyson

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(Long story warning)

I was actually in a long distance relationship and it worked out.... We had our issues though. I'm a very jealous and paranoid person and the biggest speed bump was that she had a male friend that she had been friends with since like 9th grade. Now I knew he used to like her in high school but she acts like she didn't know :usure: .... We all went to the same high school and we had some of the same friends, so that's how I knew.

Anyway after college, they didn't talk that often, but one day I went through her text messages and she said something about a massage (he just came back from the field or something and said he was sore).... :dwillhuh:

I was pissed... But mind you my girl doesn't believe in people cheating (he also had a girlfriend that went to the same school), and I know that because I've known her since we were in like 6th grade and she had been cheated on multiple times and talked to me about it all the time. For example, she has a passionate hate for dwayne wade and tony parker. And she doesn't believe in casual sex either, which was kinda win/lose for me because I didn't get any until we got in a relationship, but I also really don't have to worry about her messing around unless some Fabio nikka sweeps her off her feet....

(side note... Her friend isn't really a guy females usually found attractive. This chick he was trying to talk to use to call him "Nostril-damus") :russ:

But I'm a paranoid nikka.... so I don't care about all that fuzzy stuff. I was about to end it right there. I didn't care all she did was say something about a massage. Then I guess he thought he had an in so he said some slick stuff like when you gonna come over... and she responded with the ":sitdown:" smilie... Then he was like :dwillhuh: Then she said "uh no..... I don't think your girl would like that" and he just kinda changed the subject.

That caused a big problem... and the relationship almost ended because regardless of whether they did anything or not, I didn't appreciate her talking like that to him, and him suggesting she come over. Her excuse was their just good friends so she doesn't take him seriously. :sitdown:

We ended up resolving it... but she didn't know I was still scouting her text messages and I had access to her email. So she ended up talking to him less, I never saw anything suggestive from her again but he would still try every once in a while and get shut down. :smugdraper:

But this led to another issue because she knew at that point I didn't like him, but I wasn't buggin about them staying friends. Plus I know I've sent a few text messages in my life that I shouldn't have :jawalrus:. Anyway, they went to lunch one day during her lunch break and went to go see his townhouse him and his girl just got (I saw it in the texts) and she didn't tell me. I caught her in the lie and we almost ended it again. But I checked the phone records and saw that based on when they left to go eat, when she was on the phone with her sister, and when she called me back... they would have had to smash in like 2-4 minutes.

Needless to say I don't really let her talk to him anymore. The most they do now is exchange a few emails because he's in Afghanistan. That was like 2 years ago.

Now we're engaged. It still crosses my mind every so often... But I've done my research and my snooping and all evidence points to her being faithful (along with the fact that she had never cheated on anyone before, even the guys that cheated on her). I have her email, I know her phone password, I have her phone account information. I don't really use it anymore because all in all I trust her now... But I was a freaking private eye when this was all going down.

Oh yea and this was mostly while living an hour away from each other and only seeing each other on the weekends or every other weekend when she was working at the hospital. We did that for 9 months before I came back. Then 3 months later I ended up getting a job in Atlanta and she moved down here like 4 months after that. Everything's all gravy now though.... That's honestly the only issue we've ever really had... except how often we have sex. Tryna act like 6 nights a week is too much :sitdown:
 
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