You very very very rarely see a white star athlete with a non-white woman but why can we name countless black stars with white wives?
Let's not go that far, breh. The vast majority of black men, athletes and stars included, are married to black women. I haven't seen any statistical data to suggest that large numbers of black men are with white women.
As of 2010, only about 8.5% of all black men were married to white women (according to Wikipedia). We just tend to notice these relationships the most because they cause so much controversy.
As for the self-hate part, that may apply to some people, but sometimes people just happen to be compatible regardless of race.