The fact that Dolph Ziggler had multiple matches on Underground - even multiple in the same show - but Matt Riddle never did anything there is ridiculous. Arturo Ruas was ready for Raw Underground but you couldn't throw Thatcher out there to stretch someone for a few minutes in an atmosphere made for it? Which says nothing of the payoff we lost of Omos needing to leave the door and actually go in there and throw hands when someone eventually got handsy with Shane? fukking absurd. I swear I coulda rolled two blunts and booked out Raw Underground for months ahead of time and had everyone involved come out at least looking better than they went in. Woulda had the Gulaks and Dunnes and O'Reillys of the world on a revolving door feature program on some 'who is gonna show up on Underground this week?!?
' shyt. Woulda had Lumis debut on the main just in the crowd, being stoic. Someone in a match fukks with him and gets choked out to silence and a cutaway on his vacant stare. Immediately better than turning him into mute cartoonist Elias like they will.
Shayna and her girls woulda whooped Nia down on some early Shield pack shyt... woulda had Shayna win the Raw Women's and refuse to defend it anywhere but Underground because it was her element. Force women who want to challenge to fight through Jessamyn and Marina on some Mortal Kombat underboss shyt... leading to a Raw Underground match between her and Asuka. Let the other two run in to try and fukk things up since there are no rules, and oh, what's that? On top of the randomly-placed office?! Io Shirai?!
. She takes out Shafir and Duke, cross-promote for seeing those two catch their fade in a real match on NXT on Wednesday... and in doing all that, you show a bunch of those women with shooting backgrounds who age out of MMA that it doesn't need to just be hair extensions and breast implants if they want to keep doing something after.
But Vince is an old man who wants his way and thinks it's the only way. Meanwhile, the most juiced I got from anything on RAW this year was watching Lashley'n'em fukk nikkas up in church clothes. Well-dressed, excellently-spoken, successful black ass-kickers running roughshod over Underground until WWE has to call in their back-tatted white savior woulda been an angle that even Vince coulda gotten behind, and I assure you... it woulda gotten attention. What kind of tie is Shelton gonna wear this week and strangle a jobber with?
Lashley really finna work the whole match with his button-up tucked in?
nikkas is on twitter blowing up AEW because Miro was out there in an ugly expensive sweater beating up a ginger. Hurt Business dressed like youth pastors hurling jobbers into a crowd of onlookers woulda gotten over