It’s weird seeing her in this predikkament after all these years, because I went to school with her and remember when she was childless and had the world as her clam. Her moms had the baddest feet I ever saw on a chick…
When we were in high school we had this thing where we would call girls by guy names, so I used to call Claudette “Jeffrey.” For people calling her stupid, that’s not really the case. She was good at thinking quick on her feet. I remember when we went on a school field trip to Philly to see the Liberty Bell, Ben Franklin’s draws and all that other dumb shirt, but we stopped off at the Gallery to kick it. Me, “Jeffrey”, and a couple other nikkas/niggetts went into Sam Goody to get some tapes. So Jeffrey and this girl Risha went to the counter and did a reverse Q in Juice on the nikkas working the register while we pulled cds and tapes out the packages and bounced.
My man Boo had the portable system so we put in Redman Muddy Waters and start vibin to it outside. Everybody else leaves to do whatever and it’s just me and her at one point. So Claudette/Jeffrey gets up to get some $4.99 bourbon chicken when this stocky Rican chick comes up in her face muggin her and slurping the fawk out of a McDonald’s cup just as we was hearing “I got a sooooda, and you won’t get a got dam sip!” coming out the speakers. The timing was too on point to be coincidental. Then some dudes walk up on me and I get shook, wont even front, I’m like 130 at that time and my Timbs were too big and loosely tied to outrun them…. All the sudden the Rican yokes Claudette up and starts wailing on her while simultaneously yelling “BYTCH I TOLD YOU I WAS GONNA YADDA YADDA YADDA…DON’T BE YAYAYAYAYAYYAYAYAYAYA….” She punches her in the face and back and knees her for a minute and then Claudette yelled “STOP I’M PREGNANT!!” and then ol’ girl let’s her go and told her not to forget who the bad chick really was. Her and her nikkas went on about their business and we went to find our people. I was like
, but she said she didn’t want to talk about it. She wasn't really pregnant, or if she was the baby got murked that day in '96