1. Say Nothing or be very concise.
A) If you are dumped through text message say nothing – silence is a form of tacit communication
B) If it’s over the phone just say okay and I gotta go
C)if its face to face stay calm, don’t disagree and slowly make your exit.
Why? Keep your emotions in check, the less you say the less of anything you say or do that you will regret later will happen.
Keeping your dignity is one of the biggest and best things you can do. Crying, screaming, begging, getting angry, asking why etc. will get you nowhere except looking pathetic.
2. Don’t contact them ever again
Everyone knows of the no contact rule and trust me it works, by totally cutting all forms of communication, No fishing on facebook, twitter, instagram, snapchat, tiktok for information. No calling or texting and slowly but surely they will get smaller and smaller in your mind.
3. Never be friends with the ex
Exes only want to be friends to relieve their guilt, keep you as a backup in case the new person doesn’t work out and/or string you along to mess with your emotions. If your workplace demoted you from a paid employee to a volunteer would you still show up to work? just dead it and cut the cord go your separate ways.
4. Go hardcore and disappear
Exes no longer should have any sort of privy to your life, block them so even if they search they will not be able to contact you, change your phone number or email address if you have to. This is the quickest and best way, to kill the sickening disease known as hope that may linger in your belly.
5. Remove any pictures and any gifts
Yep remove all pictures of you two you may have hanging around, nothing is worse than seeing a picture of you and your ex smiling by your bedside etc., lingering on Facebook in your photo album with a bunch of likes and comments. Any gifts given its up to you, if it’s a constant reminder then in the trash can it goes. Remember all of this is to heal cut the cord now.
6. Let your emotions out.
Sometimes people keep their emotions buried deep inside, but trust me nothing is better than just venting whether it’s writing on a piece of paper how you feel, talking to someone who has your back, even going to therapy. Let all that hate, angry, sadness, pain out. Make sure never to your ex though, NEVER LET YOUR EX KNOW YOUR EMOTIONS.
7. Travel / Go Out
Staying hosed up at home crying in your pillow gets you nowhere, your ex is more than likely at a club, bar, hanging out not thinking of you at all so why are you wasting valuable time in your life, get out there and enjoy your new found freedom.
A few days away can do wonders, or if you can even a week. Realize that there is a big world out there with billions of individuals plus the freedom and release you feel from just relaxing and enjoying life is great.
8. Realize your ex isn’t all that
It’s amazing how your ex could be straight horrible, a cheater, abuser, liar, alcoholic, did all these horrible things to you and throughout the relationship you were stressed out and wished many times you could just go your separate ways. But once you are broken up your mind plays tricks on you and suddenly they are a perfect 10/10 with no faults. Realize your ex is not that special more than likely they were just a starter relationship in your life, but the mind is a powerful tool that is playing tricks on you.
9. Hit up relationship forums and read stories!!
Yup, you think you got it bad because your ex dumped you, or you found out your ex cheated, or you dumped them and your struggling why did I do that? Just hit up any relationship forum and read stories of 20 year marriages broken up, or 7 year relationships ended. Realize hey there are others going through this, my situation is not that special, I will get over this. And at least I wasn’t married with 2 kids and now paying alimony and child support.
10. Learn from your Mistakes
Learning from your mistakes is key, maybe you didn’t follow your gut. I remember in past relationships in my life, I had this feeling of I should get the heck out of here and ran into red flags early on, but they were hot. I did not want to hurt their feelings so I said screw it, and the emotional bond got more stronger and then ended up getting burnt in the end.This taught me for the future when I see red flags, or get a feeling to EJECT and get out of there. Remember in all your past relationships the common denominator is YOU!!!
Summing it up…….
It’s up to you, how long you want to live and battle with the pain. The more time you waste dwelling on past people in your life the longer it will take to find that next special person. Remember there is someone on their hands and knees praying for someone like you right now!
