I started at 6 years old. Didn't even know what I was doing till my ma caught me one night and I got in trouble. But she was too late. The seed (
) had already been planted. I would do it in class in elementary school. Other lil kids use to make fun of me. Little did they know that I was so far ahead of my time
I would do it in class in middle school. Became a problem once I started nuttin though. Stained my fubu shorts up real bad in the 7th grade and had to tell everybody it was syrup from breakfast. I would ask to go to the bathroom and do it in the stall after that. I lost my virginity in high school, but that didn't stop it. I hit my prime sexually in college (Alabama A&M) and was feastin but the hand game never slowed down.
I do it at work. In my car. I've ruined so many shirts and towels. In a few instances, I've had towels and tshirts collect so much nut that it began to bleach through the fabric to the point to where its permanently stained. I keep an extra rag in my car seat pouch just in case. I keep a rag in my bag just in case. I got a towel in my pillow case just in case. It use to be white. Now its golden brown like burnt lays potato chips. I call it "old reliable". It has hardened and become stiff too; very fitting for the instrument in which it cleans.
One time I masturbated 4 times within a few hours and somehow bruised my penis. Guess I was stroking too hard. It was like a scrape mark like the kind you get when you fall off your bike and scrape your knee. But I aint know it was there till I took a shower and some soap got in the wound....
I masturbated later that night. Got blood all on my hand. But the pleasure from bussin that nut outweighed the pain. That sperm burned the wound even more. Felt like alcohol. Eyes started watering. One time, I did it in the shower and the nut got caught in the drain. I didn't know until my lil cousin took a shower and asked me what that slimy stuff was cloggin the drain. He was like 11. I told him it was snot from when I sneezed. He believed it. I wonder now if he looks back and realizes that wasn't snot.
Me and my girl practicing abstinence too. So I aint having sex. These demons gettin worse.
It has made me late for class many times. Work. Church
Funerals and a wedding. Since I was 6 years old brehs, I've never gone a week without doing it.
I tried the no fap. I failed horribly. I talked to my pastor. No avail. I've had counsel from many people. I always find myself creepin through JBO in the middle of the night with a tear forming in my eye cause I have little self control. I can hear the porn calling me. Carmen Hayes, Roxy Reynolds, Angel Eyes, Ice La Fox, Ayanna Angel and Jada Fire to name a few, dominated my youth.
I got porn on deck everywhere. I got audio clips of girls moaning and sexual sounds on my ipod. I got it disguised as "Beethovens Symphony" cause I know nobody will listen to that if they found it. It sounds so clear through my beats headphones. It almost feel like I'm actually in there with them.
When I got my refund check from school, one of the first things I did was go to one of my fav porn sites and buy a few videos.
Before they shut the nudity down on dailymotion, I had an account on there full of freaky vids that I started in 2006. I was 16 in 2006. I was faithful to that site for almost 8 years. I got an account on youtube with that fye now. Bunch of twerk videos and elementary stuff compared to the heavy hittas, but it gets the job done. I got an account on xvideos, pornhub, xhamster, redtube, youporn, cliphunter, xnxx, bangbros.
On average, I masturbate 3 times a day. Thats 21 times a week. Thats about 90 times a month. Thats over 1,000 times a year...I think I calculated that correctly.
I'm tryna take control of my life in 2016 and I wanna give this up completely. 2 years ago, my homie told me to chop off my penis, man up and join the nation of islam when I tried to confide in him. Haven't spoken to him since. So now I ask a message board with thousands of people I do not know what I should do. Advise me brehs.
at beating my meat unless I'm extremely horny (which is new in itself)
