EDIT: DO NOT READ
I worked about half a day today.....had to do office work I've been been putting off and eventually gave up and said fukk it I'm out.
Went out for lunch and started throwing them back after burning 1
I was on an outdoor patio and there were a lot of PYTs out and started feeling like I gotta spice it up tonite....paid my tab and rode out to the sex store.
The place is big...it's like the size of a C-town.
I'm faded wandering around....I see some of those HD sex dolls are started fondling one checking the merchandise(lowkey that shyt is kinda dope)
I look up and a red headed staff PAWG is laughing at me and asked if I needed any help
I played it off real smooth and took her up on her offer.
She started giving me a grand tour showing me all sorts of things...I kept agreeing to everything she was suggesting to the point she needed to run back and grab a hand basket
Next thing I know we end up in the toy section and I told her how we lost the charger to the rabbit and need a replacement. She's showing off all the different vibrator models and telling me the science like I know or care.....
lowkey I'm starting to pick up on a a vybe or the drugs and drink are peaking....can't confirm either.
She's trying to sell me on a vibrator and I look at the price tag
she swears by it and I say hold up and FaceTime wifey who's at work(I'm not about to drop a c-note for a fumble.)
I flip the camera around and start asking her if she'd be into this......(my wife can't talk about sex....gets super embarrassed)
than the Staff decides it'd be a good idea to make a cameo and starts her sale pitch....my wife hangs up QUIKFAST
I say fukk it and throw it in the basket. Across the isle is the rubber dikks. I see one taller than @Billy Ocean
I ask her if she ever tried that one and she said no; only LGBTQ buys those...
I made the
face and let out a loud HARAM....
The whole mood was deaded and she was offended.
Said "I'll bring this stuff up to the counter for you
" and stopped giving me service.
Walked around a littler longer and grabbed some high level lube and went up to the counter.....as I'm checking out wifey texts me angry emojis and tells me not to spend any $$$ on any of that shyt..I'm at work WTF @maxamusa
Told staff to cancel the order....
minus the lube
She gonna be home soon and I already bought a box of franzia wine; now she mad at me for being romantic
Fukk it I'm crushing this whole box tonite dolo
I worked about half a day today.....had to do office work I've been been putting off and eventually gave up and said fukk it I'm out.
Went out for lunch and started throwing them back after burning 1
I was on an outdoor patio and there were a lot of PYTs out and started feeling like I gotta spice it up tonite....paid my tab and rode out to the sex store.
The place is big...it's like the size of a C-town.
I'm faded wandering around....I see some of those HD sex dolls are started fondling one checking the merchandise(lowkey that shyt is kinda dope)
I look up and a red headed staff PAWG is laughing at me and asked if I needed any help
I played it off real smooth and took her up on her offer.
She started giving me a grand tour showing me all sorts of things...I kept agreeing to everything she was suggesting to the point she needed to run back and grab a hand basket
Next thing I know we end up in the toy section and I told her how we lost the charger to the rabbit and need a replacement. She's showing off all the different vibrator models and telling me the science like I know or care.....
lowkey I'm starting to pick up on a a vybe or the drugs and drink are peaking....can't confirm either.
She's trying to sell me on a vibrator and I look at the price tag
she swears by it and I say hold up and FaceTime wifey who's at work(I'm not about to drop a c-note for a fumble.)
I flip the camera around and start asking her if she'd be into this......(my wife can't talk about sex....gets super embarrassed)
than the Staff decides it'd be a good idea to make a cameo and starts her sale pitch....my wife hangs up QUIKFAST
I say fukk it and throw it in the basket. Across the isle is the rubber dikks. I see one taller than @Billy Ocean
I ask her if she ever tried that one and she said no; only LGBTQ buys those...
I made the
face and let out a loud HARAM....The whole mood was deaded and she was offended.
Said "I'll bring this stuff up to the counter for you
" and stopped giving me service.Walked around a littler longer and grabbed some high level lube and went up to the counter.....as I'm checking out wifey texts me angry emojis and tells me not to spend any $$$ on any of that shyt..I'm at work WTF @maxamusa
Told staff to cancel the order....
minus the lube
She gonna be home soon and I already bought a box of franzia wine; now she mad at me for being romantic
Fukk it I'm crushing this whole box tonite dolo
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