I mean Cheddar Bay Biscuits are good as hell but not this damn good :wtf:

[Born2BKing]

Local Man in Coma After Eating 413 Red Lobster Biscuits | Rock City Times

A local food writer was rushed to UAMS hospital last night after consuming 413 Cheddar Bay Biscuits from Red Lobster. Doctors confirm that he slipped into a coma shortly after being admitted into the emergency room.

Kevin Shalin, better known as The Mighty Rib, joined a number of fellow food writers and critics to try the highest grossing restaurants in the metro area. The group chose Red Lobster of North Little Rock to start the journey because of the restaurant’s long standing place atop the highest grossing in the area, despite being unseated in the last few years by Golden Corral.

According to witnesses Shalin spoke about not eating at a Red Lobster since he was 5 years old. “He had no clue what to expect,” local food writer Daniel Walker tells us. “He sat down at the bar while we were waiting on a table and he decided to try one of the biscuits. He thought they were the most wonderful thing he ever placed in his mouth.”

Red Lobster’s signature Cheddar Bay Biscuits are given out to guest free with meals in unlimited quantities. The restaurant list the biscuits as 150 calories each and a chef for the restaurant tells us they have approximately 1/8th of a stick of butter in each. UAMS doctors are speculating that it is the equivalent of 51.5 sticks of butter that Shalin ate that is causing the coma.

“After he ate the first one he looked at us and asked if the biscuits are really free,” another guest, Kelly Gee, tells us. “I said ‘heck yeah those are free, eat as many as you want’. After about 30 I see him over asking the manager what was the record for most biscuits ate. He just came back and said I think I can do 415, and started really digging in. His beard was covered in crumbs.”

Shalin reported feeling dizzy upon consuming #412. Friends encouraged him to stop, but he continued with #413. Immediately after eating Shalin fell on the ground convulsing.

Doctors believe the butter from the biscuits have blocked signals coming from Shalin’s brain. In an early morning update hospital officials state that they have drained approximately 2 gallons of butter already and expect him to make a full recovery once the rest is clear. Shalin is expected to be released in time for his visit to Golden Corral’s chocolate wonderfall later next week.

 

[DarlingNikki]

the butter from the biscuits have blocked signals coming from Shalin’s brain

White people shyt. What kind of a$$hole eats that many biscuits?

 

[cleanface coney]

he did something alot of nikkas been hoping and wishing they could do lolol

 

[cleanface coney]

White people shyt. What kind of a$$hole eats that many biscuits?

a nikka who aint ate shyt all day lol

 

[Sensitive Blake Griffin]

RockCitytimes - Arkansas 2nd most unreliable news source

fake story

 

[61 Corpses]

"After he ate the first one he looked at us and asked if the biscuits are really free,” another guest, Kelly Gee, tells us. “I said ‘heck yeah those are free, eat as many as you want’. After about 30 I see him over asking the manager what was the record for most biscuits ate. He just came back and said I think I can do 415, and started really digging in.

Shalin reported feeling dizzy upon consuming #412. Friends encouraged him to stop, but he continued with #413. Immediately after eating Shalin fell on the ground convulsing.

I dont know why, but these parts crack me up :unclecharles: :unclecharles: :unclecharles:

 

[Born2BKing]

RockCitytimes - Arkansas 2nd most unreliable news source

fake story

And I got this shyt from a congress man's page

 

[Sensitive Blake Griffin]

And I got this shyt from a congress man's page

the story was so ridiculous I knew there was something off.

 

[L&HH]

I just had them joints the other week. Too much garlic imo.

Also just had the biscuits from ruby Tuesdays and those were

 

[beenz]

I'm callin on anyone eating that many biscuits. and they definitely ain't good for you. I made them a few times at the crib, and they require a shyt load of butter. so that's not something u wanna indulge in too often.

 

[Boolean]

if i had a way to go out, that would be top 20

 

[TheNig]

Dumbass cac shyt. And when I use cac I use it to describe dumbass white people.

 

[Youngdev]

I just had them joints the other week. Too much garlic imo.

Also just had the biscuits from ruby Tuesdays and those were

Ruby tuesdays should be ashamed of themselves for giving people them hard ass nasty ass biscuits

 

[Action Jackson]

 

[Mars Blackmon]

No way this shyt can be real. That's over 61,000 calories in one sitting