Yo this thread on reddit got me fukked up

Ze Pequeno

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First of all, people ain't shyt :wow:
This is the highest rated thread on the internet and it got people spilling out their darkest secrets, here's a sample

http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/t0ynr/throwaway_time_whats_your_secret_that_could/

My daughter turns 5 next week. If anyone knew the truth behind her parentage, I could probably lose her forever.

I grew up in foster care, never knew my parents or siblings. In my senior year, I met an older guy and we dated for almost a year... getting pregnant about 7 months in. One night while we were watching tv, the subject somehow came around to our real parents (he had been adopted as a young child). Turns out the man I was seeing, the father of my daughter... is my half-brother... we have the same mother. Our relationship didn't last, and he is not in her life, per his own choices.

My daughter is extremely smart, beautiful, and well-rounded. She'll never know the truth... her father and I made a pact to never tell her. I just hope she never needs a kidney or something

When I was about 12 I went with some family to the family dollar. My mother and cousins went off to go look at generic groceries so I decided I would just spend my time hanging out in the toy aisle, in the toy aisle there would always be these bags of marbles that other kids would open and leave laying there so I decided to fling marbles across the floor and one just happened to reach one of the far off aisles. So about two minutes later I hear a loud crash and someone scream "Somebody help this man!". Being the curious child I was, I ran over to see what the commotion was about and I find everyone gathered around this guy who had seem to have fallen from the ladder as he was getting something off the top shelf. The guy is seizing out and blood is coming from his head as he laid there and his face seemed to be turning blue. My mother whisked me and my cousins away and we left. Next time we went we talked to the front cashier and she said that they called the paramedics but by the time they got there he had died from choking. Apparently when he had the seizure he was choking on his own tongue. The cause for the fall according to the front cashier was that he had put the ladder on a marble and didn't check it before he got on it. When I heard what the cashier said I just stood in disbelief thinking I was going to jail, I tried telling my mother many times but all she did was say that I imagined it.

When i was 15 my parent's were going through a divorce, my mom worked night shifts and my dad was living with a friend of his. One night my sister who was 19 at the time came home pretty drunk from a party. She was acting goofy and fell on the couch next to me. She started grabbing my leg and laughing and we started fondling. We ended up having sex right there. When we woke up the next day she had no recollection of the night before so i just kept my mouth shut.

Fast forward to when i'm 18. Sister is home from college and dad is over for a visit. they get into an argument and in a fit of rage my dad announces how he has never forgiven her for the abortion she got when she was 19 and subsequently killing His grand child. (he's very religious)

I then realize the baby she aborted was in fact mine.....and as far as i know, i am the only one who knows since she has never mentioned that night.



there's more shyt that I didn't even want to quote, but damn if that thread ain't :scusthov: :dahell: and :gladbron: at the same damn time
 

Black smoke and cac jokes

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When i was 15 my parent's were going through a divorce, my mom worked night shifts and my dad was living with a friend of his. One night my sister who was 19 at the time came home pretty drunk from a party. She was acting goofy and fell on the couch next to me. She started grabbing my leg and laughing and we started fondling. We ended up having sex right there. When we woke up the next day she had no recollection of the night before so i just kept my mouth shut.

Fast forward to when i'm 18. Sister is home from college and dad is over for a visit. they get into an argument and in a fit of rage my dad announces how he has never forgiven her for the abortion she got when she was 19 and subsequently killing His grand child. (he's very religious)

I then realize the baby she aborted was in fact mine.....and as far as i know, i am the only one who knows since she has never mentioned that night.

:whoo: That can't be fukking true

Ok, so this is a secret I've kept for nearly 20 years.

During the summers when I was growing up, my parents would often leave my brother and I(I'm male) with our aunt and uncle who lived out in the country. It was great as they had 4 sons of ages close to ours so we had a lot of fun doing kids stuff.

One summer when I was 8, the oldest cousin was maybe 16. We somehow got talking and he asked me if I wanted to sleep in his room that night. He has the nicest room and bed so I was all for it. Got into bed and he asked if he could touch my penis. I was 8 and just thought it was ok so I let him. He rubs it for a bit and then asks me to do the same to him. So I do. This progresses and eventually I'm sucking his cock. I think I knew this was wrong so I said I didn't want to carry on. We stop and I goto sleep quite confused.

I wake up and he hands me some money and tells me never to tell anyone about what happened. Next night he tries to do the same thing.. But now all I care about is the money. So I do it. This carried on for 2 summers.

Eventually I got old enough to realize it was quite wrong regardless of the money and stopped.

I've not told anyone this. He's now married with 2 kids. I'm also married and we see them sometimes at family events. I don't have the balls to even try and talk to him about it.. Hell I'm not even sure what I'd say.

I'm sure this will get buried but just getting it off my chest makes me feel better.

Tldr I was a gay child hooker.

:to:
 
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Anothergirl

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[Background, I'm a guy in my late 20s who was taken into care aged 7.] Everyone around me already knows that I was brought up by foster families because I had a shyt early childhood. I deliberately keep it vague and say stuff like "I'd rather not go into it" so that people will just assume I was abused in some way and they'll stop asking about it.

The truth is that for the first 7 years of my life, I was brought up as a girl by my pshyco birth mother who really really really wanted a daughter and didn't let the snag of giving birth to a boy stop her from trying to raise one.

She was a pretty successful professional in a legal field (not entirely sure what) and had me via anonymous sperm donor from a fertility clinic. She found out i was a boy at a late ultrasound and then moved across the country. Gave birth to me at home and continued to move about until I was 5 or so. It was just the two of us all my life, we had contact with other people, of course, but they rarely got very close. I had lots of friends, but was always supervised.

I found out way way after that my mother's strong puritanical christianity was a lie she used to explain why she was so strict about me being 'private' and never letting anyone see me get changed or anything. i just acccepted all of this as fact, having never been told anything different.

I was sent to a religious school for girls and had a really great childhood. i was a bit of a tomboy, and played with lego and toy animals, rather than dolls and stuff, but that's not unusual and no one ever questioned i was a girl - even me. Iknew about men and women, but had never really seen much of naked people. my mother never ever spoke to me about it, but i kinda had the impression that when i grew up and got boobs and stuff, my dikk would kinda fall off or something and i would be a woman, and other kids would keep their dikks and they'd be men. I dunno, to be honest, i never really thought about it

Anyway, I carried on with my happy girlhood, and had a bunch of friends and everything was great until i was 7 and a teacher accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee over me at school. the liquid soaked through my clothes and was scalding me so the staff immediately stripped me out of my dress and underwar to get the hot coffee away from my skin. And then they found out.

the cops were called and i got taken to speak with who i guess would be Social Services. they asked me a bunch of questions about life at home and stuff. meanwhile, my mother was taken in for questioning too. she refused to acknowledge me as male and insisted i was her daughter. because she was, y'know, delusional and stuff, i wasn't allowed to go back home but got put with a foster family and went through loads of therapy and stuff.

The worst part was that literally overnight, i lost EVERYTHING. my mother, my home, all my toys, all my clothes, i moved school so lost all my friends, they cut all my hair off and told me i wasn't a girl any more. it was really really traumatic.

the first forster home wasn't that great. they had three boys already and going from a sheltered 'releigious' only-child upbringing to a rough-and-tumble testosterone-filled environment was really difficult. they tried to force me to e masculine and i was just too confused about what they wanted. anything 'girly' was reprimanded and i felt so lost and alone because nothing i did was right.

i tried to commit suicide when i was 11 and again at 13 becuase i didn't feel i fitted in anywhere. After the second attempt, they moved me to a different foster family who were awesome. I consider them to be my parents. they actually stood up for me, the first thing was that they et me grow my hair. from when i got taken into care, they buzzed my hair short, and i hated it. they always had to hold me down and do it forcably while i was crying and fighting. my new parents flatly refused to do it and said that loads of boys had long hair. they also let me quit karate and football and take up swimming and jazz dance. since i'd been in care, no one had ever stood up for my right to choose what activities to do, or how to dress before. it was amazing.

in the end, i came out of it with a pretty healthy gender identity (i'm a guy, but not th emost butch guy ever, but i'm fine with that), I went through school and got my degree and have a pretty good job and an amazing, supportive wife. everythign looks great.

but i can never speak about my early childhood, and how i grw up as a little girl.

TL;RD: I'm a guy and let people believe i was raised in care because i was abused when in fact i had a great childhood except that my mother tried to raise me as a girl.

:mindblown: it's a miracle that this dude turned out straight.
 

ugksam

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who hasn't fukked their sister while they were drunk and came inside of her and then she had to have an abortion that tore the family apart before? i swear some of you coli nerds are impressed by the most insignificant shyt.
 

Emperor Sol

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I run a cake business. I charge people hundreds for wedding cakes... Every last one is made using Pilsbury cake mix I buy for $1 a box at Walmart. I suck at baking. Every time I've ever tried to make a cake from scratch it sucked. But baking is like.. My whole deal. My friends all call me the cake girl. It's like my whole life is a lie. People compliment my cakes all the time. Telling me how delicious they are. Telling me it's so much better than box mix cake. Telling me they could never bake a cake so delicious. Well guess what? For $1, they too can make a cake just as delicious. Just add oil, eggs and water. In my defense, I love cake decorating. I make all of the frostings and fondant from scratch. I just hate baking fukking cakes!! I base my prices mostly on the decoration of the cakes and not of the cake itself of that makes sense. Still... No one knows about this except my husband. Even my best friends think I fukking slave over the oven mixing and baking these damn cakes. I have been doing this for YEARS. If anyone knew my business and reputation would be in the toilet for sure. :/ I keep telling myself I have to learn how to make the damn cakes without the box mixes, but I never do it. I feel like such a sham sometimes.

Edit-holy shyt I didn't expect such a response to this! I feel better about it thanks to a lot of these comments!

Funny, I started this account as a novelty account and got bored of googling random cakes to post as comments lol Seemed perfect for this confession!!!

Edit 2: months later I receive messages almost daily on this account. I am so glad I used a throwaway. I forget to check this account most of the time and rarely see this stuff until weeks later.

That said, to answer the main questions- yes I know I can order cake mix online, but I don't make enough cakes for it to be economical. It's actually more expensive to order online. Honestly, I'm not incredibly worried about people seeing me anymore. If I ran into someone I would tell them that I was helping my niece with a bake sale or something.

I have, since this thread, made some cakes from scratch. I'm still using box mixes for chocolate and vanilla. Oh and red velvet because fukk all of that.

Let's see what else, oh right, I've received probably 100 comments saying "The cake is a lie." We get it. It's very clever, but no, I'm sorry, you're not the first, second, third or twentieth to say it.

Overall, I've learned this is actually pretty normal. And that people from all over the world have a friend who makes cakes and they all think I am their friend. So far no one has pinned me, but you guys had better check your friend's cabinets for Pilsbury mix ;)

:banderas::banderas::banderas::banderas::banderas:


[Background, I'm a guy in my late 20s who was taken into care aged 7.] Everyone around me already knows that I was brought up by foster families because I had a shyt early childhood. I deliberately keep it vague and say stuff like "I'd rather not go into it" so that people will just assume I was abused in some way and they'll stop asking about it.

The truth is that for the first 7 years of my life, I was brought up as a girl by my pshyco birth mother who really really really wanted a daughter and didn't let the snag of giving birth to a boy stop her from trying to raise one.

She was a pretty successful professional in a legal field (not entirely sure what) and had me via anonymous sperm donor from a fertility clinic. She found out i was a boy at a late ultrasound and then moved across the country. Gave birth to me at home and continued to move about until I was 5 or so. It was just the two of us all my life, we had contact with other people, of course, but they rarely got very close. I had lots of friends, but was always supervised.

I found out way way after that my mother's strong puritanical christianity was a lie she used to explain why she was so strict about me being 'private' and never letting anyone see me get changed or anything. i just acccepted all of this as fact, having never been told anything different.

I was sent to a religious school for girls and had a really great childhood. i was a bit of a tomboy, and played with lego and toy animals, rather than dolls and stuff, but that's not unusual and no one ever questioned i was a girl - even me. Iknew about men and women, but had never really seen much of naked people. my mother never ever spoke to me about it, but i kinda had the impression that when i grew up and got boobs and stuff, my dikk would kinda fall off or something and i would be a woman, and other kids would keep their dikks and they'd be men. I dunno, to be honest, i never really thought about it

Anyway, I carried on with my happy girlhood, and had a bunch of friends and everything was great until i was 7 and a teacher accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee over me at school. the liquid soaked through my clothes and was scalding me so the staff immediately stripped me out of my dress and underwar to get the hot coffee away from my skin. And then they found out.

the cops were called and i got taken to speak with who i guess would be Social Services. they asked me a bunch of questions about life at home and stuff. meanwhile, my mother was taken in for questioning too. she refused to acknowledge me as male and insisted i was her daughter. because she was, y'know, delusional and stuff, i wasn't allowed to go back home but got put with a foster family and went through loads of therapy and stuff.

The worst part was that literally overnight, i lost EVERYTHING. my mother, my home, all my toys, all my clothes, i moved school so lost all my friends, they cut all my hair off and told me i wasn't a girl any more. it was really really traumatic.

the first forster home wasn't that great. they had three boys already and going from a sheltered 'releigious' only-child upbringing to a rough-and-tumble testosterone-filled environment was really difficult. they tried to force me to e masculine and i was just too confused about what they wanted. anything 'girly' was reprimanded and i felt so lost and alone because nothing i did was right.

i tried to commit suicide when i was 11 and again at 13 becuase i didn't feel i fitted in anywhere. After the second attempt, they moved me to a different foster family who were awesome. I consider them to be my parents. they actually stood up for me, the first thing was that they et me grow my hair. from when i got taken into care, they buzzed my hair short, and i hated it. they always had to hold me down and do it forcably while i was crying and fighting. my new parents flatly refused to do it and said that loads of boys had long hair. they also let me quit karate and football and take up swimming and jazz dance. since i'd been in care, no one had ever stood up for my right to choose what activities to do, or how to dress before. it was amazing.

in the end, i came out of it with a pretty healthy gender identity (i'm a guy, but not th emost butch guy ever, but i'm fine with that), I went through school and got my degree and have a pretty good job and an amazing, supportive wife. everythign looks great.

but i can never speak about my early childhood, and how i grw up as a little girl.

TL;RD: I'm a guy and let people believe i was raised in care because i was abused when in fact i had a great childhood except that my mother tried to raise me as a girl.

EDIT: holy crap, I never expected such a response. Have finally remembered the password I used for this account and am answering any questions I find. Thank you, reddit!

Yo this is an utterly fukked up story :to:
 

Ze Pequeno

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:dead: @ nikkas believing these blatantly contrived :duck:

:snoop:
it's a true breh, white people are on a whole nother level. this white chick that I dated for a while told me she used to fukk her first cousin. she told me like it was nothing :snoop:

and a friend of a friend used to jerk his dog off while he had company
 
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