The Psychology of a Killer: based upon this Hot Boy Gangsta interview

[murksiderock]

So, this thread isn't so much as about the interview as it is the mindset of killers in general. Though we can absolutely discuss different aspects of the interview...

The interview is almost an hour and a half long, but it's really the first 22 minutes or so that are relevant to me, because fam spoke on a number of aspects I've spoken on before on here...

First of all, shout out to homie for going civilian and staying clean, it's so rare that someone with his background lives like he did and turns 100% legit. To me he deserves the ultimate respect for that...

A couple points he touched on though, parallel my own experiences, and I've detailed these points on here at various times. And I want to be very clear from jump, he and I weren't playing in the same lane, this nikka was a grave digger who went away at like 24 years old with his hand in dozens of bodies, I've seen 40 as the quoted number, which means he was probably involved in at least that many shootings that didn't turn out a kill. He says in the interview he was 11 first time he shot someone, and I know he did stretches locked up before his long bid but from 11-24 we talking someone who was probably involved in over 80 shooting incidents and over 40 kills....

In comparison, first time I shot someone I was 20, and it was over a 5-year stretch that I shot about 8 people, 10 different shootings. No one I shot ever died, so there's a difference there, but I spoke on this psychology before, Gangsta hit on it here, and I'm gonna reinforce it in a few minutes. But Gangsta was really a gunner, I was never taking hits, wasn't a head hunter, though there are people who had that perception of me at different times...

The actual mentality is something that is 100% relatable, I'm about to highlight some parts of the first 22 minutes of the interview below!

 

[murksiderock]

No Regrets
At around the 2:00 mark he speaks about having no regrets in his past, because he never harmed women or children...

I've been asked before if I had any regrets, and my answer is virtually identical. I never harmed anyone who wouldn't have harmed me first. I never targeted innocent people who weren't in the streets. I didn't attack kids...

The only thing I'll say is, I didn't hunt out women but when a woman is running the streets, she fair game. I had a girlfriend once who was really like that, and I've spoken on a shooting before where a woman shot at me and I fired back. Also had an incident where a different woman fired on me. Those kinda women, I was never into targeting chicks but they make the choice to run that lane, they fair game...

But I also have no regrets, I never went for anyone who wouldn't come for me. It's important to say, that some brothers do, this isn't the same for every guy but I align with Gangsta in this sense...

If he ever got someone mistakenly
He said no, same thing here. I never once went to firing on anyone in a drive by, every shooting I was ever involved in i was right there, people knew it was me. No mask, and I wear glasses anyway and not that I'm some expert marksman but I was intentional, if I had to shoot I wasn't reckless...

What makes a "real killer"
This starts at 3:20, I've DEFINITELY spoken on this before!

There's plenty if guys with kills on em who weren't killers and weren't shooters, and ultimately, I'd say I'm part of that group, because I wasn't running round just clapping shyt up like guys like Gangsta were. Gangsta goes into differentiating between guys who would hunt shyt, guys who would handle shyt if brought to them, and guys who if pushed far enough would kill something...

I knew a guy once who was repeatedly robbed by the same nikka like 4 or 5 times, because he was sweet, he wasn't a killer. Then on that last robbery attempt he smoked the guy who had been victimizing him. We looked at it like, dude who got killed had it coming, but we still didn't view the shooter as a shooter because that's not how it works outside...

For me, I really toed the line here. Because I wasn't someone you could pass off threats too, and I didn't look to other guys to support me in my issues, majority of violence I was involved in I was with myself, which gets touched on later. I had a fuse, but I wasn't a hunter, and I think the major characteristic contrast between someone like Gangsta and someone like me, is my introduction to the streets and my spirit in it at core wasn't thru violence, it was thru chasing money...

Whereas later, Gangsta speaks on how he was involved in dealing but at his core you can tell this was a guy who was about gun action...

But, to tie a point I've made prior, bunch of people could and have killed if they have to. Everyone isn't a killer, everyone doesn't have that mentality. It's a very low percentage of guys outside who really have that mindset, always has been...

 

[MoveForward]

In comparison, first time I shot someone I was 20, and it was over a 5-year stretch that I shot about 8 people, 10 different shootings.

I have played in the streets and I’ve never had to shoot anyone or even think about it. The fukk wrong with you dude?

 

[murksiderock]

What initiated violence
All my conflicts were robbery or drug related, with the exception of an occasion I was called to a club when one of my boys got into it with other guys there. I didn't even know who those guys at the club were, but all the other occasions I knew who I was into it with and they knew me...

Gangsta and them had beef with nikkas from rival sets, I was a loner so I was never really in no "hood vs hood" beef on no major level. All my issues were more personal...

Gangsta points out some guys he was into it with who are deceased who were factors. For me, I've never name dropped anyone I know who is still alive and/or active, just not my thing, but occasionally I've talked about some guys I know who are deceased. Probably the baddest mf I was ever into it with who is gone, Rodriguez Harris:

Families of slain Fayetteville men seek leads in shooting

Ten days after two men were killed in a Fayetteville shootout, family members of the men pleaded Thursday for witnesses to come forward and help authorities solve the case.

www.wral.com

I was in NY when I found out he was killed on Mothers Day 2011, and I'll never forget my reaction being pissed that I wasn't the one to do him. But Rodriguez was most definitely a legit figure. And of course, there are guys I was into it with who are still alive and active, one of em, real big local nikka...

I wasn't into beefing over chicks (white boy tried this with me once, didn't go well for him), I wasn't beefing over shoes or material shyt, and I certainly wasn't doing no internet beef...

Therapy and Nightmares
Gangsta said he's never had nightmares, some guys do, some guys dont. I've never had literal nightmares, but I've spoken on, there's been times I've had random flashbacks on things, at random times. Not always pleasant but not nightmares, though there are guys who say they deal with those...

And I think anyone whose dealt with the paranoia of the streets probably has a degree of PTSD and needs some counseling...

Like Gangsta, when I saw or was in proximity to guys doing fukked up shyt, it didn't really bother me. It bothers me more today in retrospect, than it ever did in real time when I was in it and around it...

The sport of killing someone
Gangsta said he only hung with a handful of guys, similar to me. I was a loner, handful of cats I hung with at different times, but I was a solo g. But he spoke straight facts, someone always knew when you hit someone because you told the people closest to you or someone told it for you...

I wasn't so caught up in competing with cats on it but it did mean something when people could look at you and identify you as "the nikka who hit ______". It was a feather in the cap, and after being in a few situations cats will look at you different...

Also he right when he said cats never know how they gone react when they drop something, the most annoying thing to me is listening to guys talk who never felt those emotions. I've git several examples of this, from a fairly high level hustler I once knew that shot at some cats once and said it scared him from ever even getting a gun again; to a late 20s guy who was a gun runner with a hellafied plug on hammers, thought he was tough, but never popped nothing; to a late-30s guy who owned all his guns legit and never hit nothing but used to talk about "if a nikka try me"; to plenty other examples...

You never know how you'll react to something. I remember I was sure I killed this nikka once, and it was maybe two days or so before I found out he pulled thru, and I guess I was fairly numb about it. Felt accomplished, in one sense. But it was a numbing feeling for me. But dudes never know hoe they'll react...

I didn't get my first gun until I was 16, and like anyone else it put a battery in my back. At that age I wasn't so enamored with knocking something off, it was more the imagery of having one...

 

[murksiderock]

I have played in the streets and I’ve never had to shoot anyone or even think about it. The fukk wrong with you dude?

Just different scenarios, I also knew guys who never had to shoot anyone but were outside. Prison really changed my outlook more than anything, going so young, because I wasn't raised around a bunch of killers nor were the nikkas I looked up to tge most, the killers...

I wanted to emulate the pretty boy hustlers with the money and women, but I had a violent streak...

How he turned away from that lifestyle
Gangsta said doing almost 24 years broke it for him. For me, I only did 5 years total, and it didnt break me. But I've been very candid about, when I found out the birth of my daughter was upcoming in '16, it started changing my outlook, and eventually broke me...

Add to that, I don't have any more strikes to give, I'd get put away for a long time with any other issue. And then I've had the blessing of looking back at everything I skated on, that adds to it for me. He 100% right, when you get on them yards, you find out alot about yourself. Some dudes are jail guys, some are street guys, some thrive in both settings. There are plenty of guys who were like that outside and weren't anything special inside...

It wasn't easy to turn away and I'll be honest, some aspects of who you were then, never leave you. I'm 6 years removed and some elements will probably always be part of my personality...

Personality more a dealer or shooter
Gangsta said he hated selling drugs. Hed rob something and have en or kick it with one of his homies who was into it, but he was never a dealer and at his core that isnt who he is. And this is the biggest characteristic difference between someome like me and someone like him...

At my core I was a hustler. I was selling weed, crack, lean, years before I ever shot something. I was a hustler who wasn't shy about shooting and I've also been candid about my early 20s stretch as a jackboy, but that shyt wasn't for me. And probably at my core, neither was shooting and beefing because last time I shot someone I was 25 and I still was around after that...

I do notice that the more successful I was financially the fewer risks of violence I had. I think that's a personality thing, because if I was wired more like Gangsta, I'd have had more of a blood lust. But I think this one personality difference explains the separation between a guy who was part of over 40 kills and a guy who was in 10 shootings total, at his core he was a gunman. At my core I wanted to be a fly ass caked up nikka...

Gangsta would rather have robbed or shot something and he took hits, he was a real hit man. I never took hits, wasn't something I pursued because those situations were around if that's who I was and what I was looking for. Had two hits put on me though, one in prison when I was 18-19, and one when I was 21-22 on the streets...

 

[Boonapalist]

You know I fw with you on here but you know this isn’t the place for a conversation like this. But the first time I remember anyone talking about anything similar to this was when Monster Kody and his brother got big in the media.

 

[Da Spot Is Hot]

So, this thread isn't so much as about the interview as it is the mindset of killers in general. Though we can absolutely discuss different aspects of the interview...

The interview is almost an hour and a half long, but it's really the first 22 minutes or so that are relevant to me, because fam spoke on a number of aspects I've spoken on before on here...

First of all, shout out to homie for going civilian and staying clean, it's so rare that someone with his background lives like he did and turns 100% legit. To me he deserves the ultimate respect for that...

A couple points he touched on though, parallel my own experiences, and I've detailed these points on here at various times. And I want to be very clear from jump, he and I weren't playing in the same lane, this nikka was a grave digger who went away at like 24 years old with his hand in dozens of bodies, I've seen 40 as the quoted number, which means he was probably involved in at least that many shootings that didn't turn out a kill. He says in the interview he was 11 first time he shot someone, and I know he did stretches locked up before his long bid but from 11-24 we talking someone who was probably involved in over 80 shooting incidents and over 40 kills....

In comparison, first time I shot someone I was 20, and it was over a 5-year stretch that I shot about 8 people, 10 different shootings. No one I shot ever died, so there's a difference there, but I spoke on this psychology before, Gangsta hit on it here, and I'm gonna reinforce it in a few minutes. But Gangsta was really a gunner, I was never taking hits, wasn't a head hunter, though there are people who had that perception of me at different times...

The actual mentality is something that is 100% relatable, I'm about to highlight some parts of the first 22 minutes of the interview below!

 

[Double Burger With Cheese]

Don’t fukk around and open up your own cold case files nikka

 

[Trav]

Big Murk, you know u gang but I'ma need u to chill, cuz .

 

[murksiderock]

You know I fw with you on here but you know this isn’t the place for a conversation like this. But the first time I remember anyone talking about anything similar to this was when Monster Kody and his brother got big in the media.

I don't have anywhere I talk about this stuff, this is an outlet. I don't associate with people I used to roll with, I don't have these convos in my day to day. shyt like this popped up into my algorithm because I watched the first Vlad interview he did, he just did a new one I haven't watched but this popped up with it...

I never read Kody's book, so this is really the first interview I've ever seen where a guy expresses clearly some sentiments I've expressed before. So I guess making this thread was like some, "man I been telling yall" type shyt...

Don’t fukk around and open up your own cold case files nikka

Ain't nothing coming from what I've said, but I hear you bruh...

 

[FlimFlam]

This is silly for several reasons

But to play along you aint never killed nobody but you comparing yourself to a killer...the internet made for stuff like this lol cause the people you claiming as a peer group wouldnt accept that

 

[murksiderock]

This is silly for several reasons

But to play along you aint never killed nobody but you comparing yourself to a killer...the internet made for stuff like this lol cause the people you claiming as a peer group wouldnt accept that

You outta your element here...