Essential The Official Football (Soccer) Thread - Life and Death for South America, Pre-Season for Europe: The Club World Cup

[yoyoyo1]

http://www.sbnation.com/soccer/2013/12/6/5182388/united-states-2014-world-cup-ante-up

some dcent stuff in here

You're wrong if you think the United States men's national soccer team got "screwed." "Screwed" implies someone taking your job after some country club negotiations and white-collar chicanery. "Screwed" is you, staring at a hospital bill you and your descendants won't be able to pay. "Screwed" is for schnooks, losers, and bumpkins outflanked by the cruel, plotting hands of The Man living high in his mansion on the hill.

You got a beautiful goddamned gift in getting utterly and completely f----d by FIFA
No, United States soccer fans, you did not get "screwed." You got a beautiful goddamned gift in getting utterly and completely f----d by FIFA. This is always act one of the movie. This is you failing at the dance-off and getting served. This is Brad Wesley bulldozing the one man in town who stood up to him. This is the owner turning off the cold water, putting you on buses, and daring you to win the league before she closes shop and takes the whole operation to Miami. You just lost your first street race, but you'll be damned if you aren't gonna live your life a quarter mile at a time.

Oh you have been given a gift: a spot at the bottom of a pit with Ghana, Germany, and Portugal standing right on your back to start the fight. Sepp Blatter stands at the lip of the pit, laughing at you and drinking a Coca-Cola laced with human growth hormone and whatever else keeps his evil, grinning corpse clinging to life. You have been given the sweetest of motivations: revenge against the shadowy, foreign-ish illuminati who pull the strings of existence with malevolent intent.

You'll have to take them on one by one.

theres more

and this nikka links Ante Up at the end

 

[Roaden Polynice]

So last weekend brehs, I pulled a babe from the bar who was 10 years my senior

Her mindset was actually quite different than the girls I'm used to having relations with. For one she was a homeowner, had a masters degree. But moreover, she was very calm about everything, not a hint of self-doubt, not once in the night. Confidence. It's actually pretty obvious when you see it with women. Also, in a magnificently brilliant note, she simply left in the morning. And that is OK. You simply knew we were never going to talk again, it was unstated that this, thing that we had, was always time sensitive. Ending right around when Man City kicked off against Swansea. There's something beautiful about the one night stand that is mutually, perfectly, executed

She was funny to talk to (though, I think in classic singles mid-30s fashion she divulged a bit too much about her singles/online dating travails. Said on eharmony it is a bunch of lame dudes who didn't do much for her and, in her words, she wanted someone with a "bit of edge." Little did she know she was sitting with a man who enjoys khakis and whose favorite band is Vampire Weekend . From there on I just made sure to sprinkle my speech with some "fukks" here and there, lingering eye contact, fleeting touches on the thighs and lower back...you know...EDGE).

You always hear from friends, "Oh, older women are different, much different" but you usually write that off as non-sensical bullshyt. But I guess this one experience sorta spoke to that.

Long story short, it was the best vagina I've ever had, and her body was top notch. It was a pleasure to roam those hills

 

[yoyoyo1]

so she wanted you, you wanted her.

none of that tease-y flirting stuff? don't get me wrong, I love viciously ripping a nice girl to pieces, but that sounds better

 

[Roaden Polynice]

Beforehand yeah, there was the requisite 'game' of course, flirting, subtle double entendres etc. Sorta need that I'd say, I don't think I've ever had a girl where it was just, boom, go. Every broad needs a bit of easing.

 

[QuintessentialBM]

Best case scenario..... We win second place. US comes out firing on all cylinders to beat Ghana. Ronaldo can't win the game by himself because the rest of his team disappears. Expecting a L vs Germany but stranger thing have happened.

Worse case scenario..... We're embarrassed in every match. No points. No goals scored. Average margin of defeat... 3 goals.


Timmy Howard and Brad Guzan need to have the tournament of their lives and everyone has to find their scoring boots or it's going to be a very short, painfull and embarrassing world cup exit.

 

[twan83]

i just saw our group we gonna get our asses beat on some FSU vs unranked FB squad

 

[Grams]

@penfield must be nice




My breh @twan83 making a special guest appearance in the thread

 

[Grams]

Brehs I'm going out in a blaze of glory I don't give a fook anymore

 

[twan83]

@penfield must be nice




My breh @twan83 making a special guest appearance in the thread

i u fam
i watch soccer every so often and have gotten more into it as i got older dont even care who is playing i enjoy watching it. being at the world cup in 2002 started then stationed in italy for 3 years officially sold me cuz thats what was on most and cycling and sexy italian women

 

[Black Magisterialness]

I know people are all bent out of shape about the Group Of Death BUT


if the US can beat Ghana and pull one against Portugal (which ISN'T as impossible as it sounds) they might be able to make it out of the group...they have NOTHING for Germany though. But i can imagine Ronaldo trolling the States though.

 

[Grams]

It's hilarious how USA is gonna play Ghana afukkinggain. Sepp Blatter or whoever's in charge of that shyt is trolling on 100

 

[Grams]

If Arsenal tie with Everton then proceed to lose to City + Chelsea in the next coming weeks :lallana:

 

[I.AM.PIFF]

Belgium, Russia & Korea. We can do it




At least I hope

 

[Ukbrotha]

If Arsenal tie with Everton then proceed to lose to City + Chelsea in the next coming weeks :lallana:

We'd still have Moyes in charge though.

 

[SCORCH]

So @SCORCH, you're really Belgian ? I'm still baffled by that revelation.

I wear my national pride on my sleeve doe.