Marriage Has Always Been A Sacred Tradition In Black Culture Until Contact With Whites

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Just look at what we've become now, where these zombies think marriage is cruel and evil....look at how being a single parent and hoeing around is celebrated throughout Amerikkkan culture via Feminism. This debauchery only became celebratory upon contact with whites and their disgusting culture and nature.......

AFRICAN MARRIAGE | Marriage | Pro- Life | Family | Culture

African weddings are a spiritual and social family affair and involve the combining of two lives, two families, and even two communities!
There is no great civilization that has ever existed that abstained from marriage as one of its core fundamentals of nation building.

"A man without a wife is like a vase without flowers "
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African Proverb

Marriage is sacred in Africa and beyond, because it solidifies relationship that enrich communities and nations by bring forth new life and new hope. African cultures celebrate the coming of the rains, the first harvest and the birth of a child. Marriage is that cultural process which ushers in new life. It is a cherished and most celebrated rite of passage since the dawn of African civilization. But marriage is not a human right: Human rights don’t need licenses or certificates. Marriage is instead a privilege afforded by communities, between man and woman for those who meet the criteria.

Marriage is the only known incubator for the raising of balanced socially functional children. It is a civilized union of man and woman. The ideal set up for a child to be raised in to full functionality in the African context as a contributor to civilization. It is the institutionalization of complementary relationship between male and female energies, enshrining in the child sentiments and values from both sexes. This is the formula which is secured with marriage. Extended family systems sits in this equation by sharing responsibilities and enshrining balance. Even if a woman is unable to contribute by having her own biological children her role as a mother is expressed in a communal set up. And hence why the Pan-African proverb of it takes a village to raise a child. Parenting is communal, and the harmony of male and female energies are critical in enshrining balanced humans.
 
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In all the communities the bride plays a very special role and is treated with respect because she is a link between the unborn and the ancestors. A bride might eventually bear a very powerful child. Women are mothers of civilization which earns them a high status in society, thus protecting women and children is a biological human instinct.

And if a people cannot get the man and the woman into equitable agreement and commitment-- then what about the nation, and the continent? In a good marriage means partners compliments each other, and makes both parties better. Marriage is a journey through life which enhances and enriching entire communities. Marriage promotes sharing, tolerance, consideration, empathy, selflessness, and other virtues. Lack of marriage is the death of a nation and a people. Communities that fail to recognize marriage become decadent and self-destructive with a range of social, economic and health issues (HIV, etc). :sas2:
 

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"Anybody can make a baby, but a father helps to raise his children. There is another word for fatherhood. It's called responsibility."

El Hajj Malik Shabazz(Malcolm X)

"The overall African philosophy is that life and the reproduction of life sit at the core of human society. Men and women have children who ritualize their parents and ancestors."

Molefi Asante

There are many steps that take place before marriage starting at a very young age where training takes place in how to be a suitable partner.

Girls will many times go to schools where women teach them what is involved in marriage, and in some ethnic groups even learn secret codes and languages so that they can communicate with other married women. In the Wolof people there is even a time where the elders of the village gather with the bride and give advice and gifts. Weddings can be very elaborate, involving feasting and dancing for days within a community, they can be very simple, or they can even be performed in huge marriage ceremonies involving many different couples.

In the Diaspora, especially the UK, marriage is compounded by a the social culture of the "baby- mama" syndrome. Which according to some experts is a manifestation of immaturity and lack of moral responsibility. Marriage squeeze refers to the demographic imbalance in which the number of potential brides does not approximately equal the number of potential grooms. With African men being "deleted" from the marriage pool via: inter-racial choice, prisons, sexual-orientation, etc it is having profound consequences on African-Diaspora finding suitable partners, especially if they are educated and looking for men from that social class.
 

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When you look around the history of human civilization and see the tradition of marriage that standsindependent of time, race, geography and culture. It means it is a aspect of civilization, humanity and human culture. Marriage historically has be used in political unions between nations, between different ethnic groups to secure peace, trade and development. And marriage is one thing that unites African culture, although two marriages will never be similar. You can marry in a church, a mosque, in the bush, by a priest, an Imam, minster of justice, underwater, in a tree, the core thing is marriage is a contract of commitment with rules and regulations that represent the persons culture. It is a communal relationship, a rite of passage which bonds two people and enshrines obligations and values. And even while people may get divorced they are guidelines and ethics in every culture for governing all aspects of married life. Marriage is dignity and a true sign of commitment. It defines our humanity and contributes to making us more human. It is exclusively between naturally God man members of the opposite sex.
 

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A good relationship is not only defined by the high points, it is also defined by how people handle the low points. It is how they survive conflict and struggle in an equitable progressive way. Two people are married and they boast "We never had a disagreement, we never had an argument"— Then that marriage is untested. It is the marriage or relationship that had the weight of challenges bearing down upon them and resolved them through mutual growth —that is a real marriage. It is like a body that has an immune system for future challenges.

In the Western world because of feminism a good marriage is constructed differently from the African paradigm. Asking your wife to bring you a cup of tea while you relax and watch the game is a "no-no." But why would this be a problem in an equitable relationship, where at another stage when the wife wants to stay in bed the husband reciprocates. So a relationship is a single unit made up of two parts which complement, support, reinforce, and give pleasure to one another. All of this is wrapped in the concept of justice— what is fair to all, and what is righteous to all.
 

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THE SMALLEST PAN-AFRICAN ELEMENT

We cannot even begin to discuss Pan-Africanism outside of the context of marriage because the smallest element of Pan-Africanism is the African family unit. An the legal and moral fabric of African family unity is the marriage. Accountability and stability within the family requires understanding, trust, tolerance, balance, and justice, all the ingredient for Pan-Africanism on a global level.

Failure of the home speaks to the health of the broader people block. It is impossible to discuss social development and reconstruction of African people and not include the issue of marriage.

The Diaspora community has the lowest marriage rates of any ethnic group, a direct legacy of the African Holocaust. Because during the Maafa the first African institution that was destroyed was marriage. During Apartheid again the male-female relationship was placed under duress due to forced settlement and seasonal mine work which took the men far from their homestead. These isolated men then sought refuge in casual relationships with prostitutes ultimately leading to a health crisis. What nation in history has achieved greatness that did not practice marriage? Marriage was central inAksum, Kemet, Songhai, Zulu Kingdom, every known African civilization. India, China, Europe, Central America, Japan, all have strong traditions of marriage as backbones of nation building and peoplehood. Marriage has been a political stabilizer in the growth of every major empire, it was even used to broker unity between belligerents in Europe, African and Asia. Marriage between clans and nations has been a way of securing peace and trade. The entire history of political power in every nation was linked to marriage. Pan-Africanism and Marriage are interlinked because it is the most central and common African tradition, sacred to to all African people on the continent. It is therefore the building block of nationhood and our first form of unity.
 

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PICKING A PARTNER

A Special Message to ladies: Guard your body. Men have no great inhibition so do not expect them to decline the invitation. 9/10 they will take anything you offer without terms and conditions (aka commitment). And when looking for a partner discard this nonsense you see in love movies, this foolishness: oh he is so cute, look at his clothes and car. This dizzy 5 minute romance spell, do you know him? Does he have a job and a backbone? So Look for a hard working man that is discussing a serious future: family and home making.

A Special Message for the guys: Your women is your Queen, the total value of you as a human being is totally dependent on the value of your women. If you see them as common sex toys, temporary pleasure, fun. Then you have just declared your base value to the world. And this is why, despite all the negative media, Muslim women have a high value. Because Muslim communities protect the honor of their women-- same goes for Jews, and Indians. So a nation is measured by the virtue of the womenfolk. You can then add value to the African women, or you can contribute to the moral decline of the community by exploiting them.

Yes, there are women out there who want you only because of how much alcohol you can buy for them, but avoid them at all cost. Gold diggers empty your pocket, so look for a women who wants to build something real, who has family values and a productive vision of herself in the longterm. Women who occupy themselves with Whatsapp and always on the mobile talking about only gossip and materialism (Blackberry, Brazilian weave, cars and alcohol) give them a pass, no matter how pretty they look.
 

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Slavery And marriage

During the African Holocaust of enslavement marriage was pointless if you were owned by the slave master. A person could be sold off at any instant. Everything is temporary -- commitment is void when someone owns you. And we must, regardless of our martial status, be bold enough to see the errors that are out growths of enslavement. The destruction of people systems, the death of things that define our humanity. The temporariness of the enslaved reality meant also commitment was also fleeting. Long term arrangements in areas of marriage and parenting were nonexistent. And today the habits of enslaved people still run our relationships with each other. So a man can get a woman pregnant and simply abandon his responsibilities, this is slave culture. A woman feels no dishonor in having multiply children and no wedding ring. This is again only because we are a people void of culture. :sas1:
 

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They said it take a village to raise a child, but what happens when our villages are ghettos and our children are young mothers, and unemployable missing fathers? The "village" becomes modulated by the state and MTV Base. During the African Holocaust of enslavement marriage was pointless if you were owned by the slave master A person could be sold off at any instant. Everything is temporary -- commitment is pointless when someone owns you. And we must regardless of our martial status be bold enough to see the errors which are out growths of enslavement.

Nearly 72% of African American children are born out of wedlock, and raised by single mothers.


The destruction of people systems, the death of things that define our humanity. The temporariness of the enslaved reality meant also commitment was also fleeting. long term arrangements in areas of marriage and parenting were nonexistent. And today the habits of enslaved people still run our relationships with each other.

Not only are African Americans the least likely to marry, they are also the most likely to divorce. According to a study by the Pew Research Center. African-American children are significantly less likely than other children to be living with two married parents. (70 percent of African-American children are born to unmarried parents). In 2006, 35 percent of African-American children were living with two parents, compared with 84 percent of Asian children, 76 percent of non-Hispanic White children, and 66 percent of Hispanic children. – Child Trends DataBank, 2007 The Trend in the UK is even more dire with inter-racial marriages dominating over same-race marriages. African-American marriage rate seems to be on the upswing--from 46.1 percent in 1996 to 47.9 percent in 2001--after a 40-year downward spiral. The bad news is that the number of Black married couples is only half the number of married Whites, and the situation is getting worse. In 1963, more than 70 percent of all African-American families were headed by married couples. In 2002 that number was 48 percent.

In South Africa only a third of children are living with both of their biological parents, according to a new report.The report, The First Steps to Healing the South African Family, shows that 40% of children live only with their mothers, 3% live only with their father, and 23% live with neither of their biological parents. Some 8% of children live in 'skip generation households' with their grandparents or great aunts and uncles.
 

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In the olden days two people meet 2 times and got married on the 3rd meeting -- and these marriages lasted a lifetime. Today couples date for 3 years and get divorced 6 months after finally getting married. What has changed?

Modern societies put demands on African people that were not there historically. Women are expected to do everything their ancestors did (cook and clean and raise children) as well as everything Hollywood women do (look like Beyonce and be hyper-sexualized like Karrine Steffans). The economic balance has also changed meaning that women oftentimes earn more than men.

These factors, combined with the adoption of western philosophy in how to handle them has resulted in imbalance.

Because of the over sexualization and promiscuous nature of societies people are becoming less tolerant, and at the first sign of a flaw they get out of the marriage. The family structures that make people sit down under peer review is vanishing and the taboos of shame and dignity are also evaporating so a man or a woman can conduct themselves immorally without worry of the societies shame. In traditional African societies any abuse (against a woman for example) would be discussed with the community elders. Disputes which once could easily fixed by intercession, are now reasons for irreconcilable squabbles. And a small thing will become a big thing if you do not know how to handle it. The perception of disrespect can ruin trust. Because people need to be more guarded because of the fickle nature of modern marriages. So it is even more important for each person to confirm their commitment, to offer symbols of that commitment constantly. Something as simple as keeping yourself attractive to each other could be the difference between a strong marriage and a dying marriage.

Understanding and accommodating difference and growth are critical to sustaining marriages. It will never be about 100% equality, but more 100% harmony by negotiation. Respect is absolutely critical, and honesty is the heart of that respect. And there is a myth that these guidelines only apply to monogamous relationships—not so. In any marriage set up, plural or otherwise, honesty is still the key. If a man is married to two women he must be equitable and honest just as if it was monogamous. Having another wife is not cheating, it is only an act of dishonesty which violates the marriage contract.

Many factors, esp. the destruction of family, and family values due to economic pressures of urban development contribute to the demise of an unbalanced marriage. So already even if the marriage is in good spirit, it struggles. The solution must be holistic, and balanced. An evolution of how we see gender roles that will fit into modernity and the challenges of that modernity is key. Balance also means finding a balance between the necessity and urgency of marriage vs. the consequences of forced marriage.
 

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What were African women fighting for before the 1950's, before Europeans coined a term to articulate their specific Eurocentric struggle within the cultural borders of European social-cultural milieu?

What were women in Angola and Ethiopia and South Africa doing in the 15th century? What about in Ancient Egypt?To assume, by emotional attachment to the colonizers language,that feminism and woman's justice is the same is to assume that Jewish self-determination equals Zionism. We need to deconstruct feminism from its global linguistic imposition and evaluate its paradigms, contrasting them against communal cultures quest for gender harmony and justice.

In the African paradigm (sometimes mistakenly called African feminism) we see how male inclusion is central, how biological determination is factored in, and how spiritual components merge together. It's ethical root is on concepts such as Maat, not individualism.

Feminism rotates in the west and is exported to infect, and attach themselves to the broader Woman’s struggle for justice and equality in a male dominated world. However as a paradigm is diabolically anti-African anti-human neologism emerging out of the Eurocentric reactionary women’s movement in the 50’s. To collapse feminism and women’s rights is a fundamental linguistic flaw as the two concepts articulate completely different social realities. It is therefore inadequate to use the term feminism and apply this loaded word to the gender issues of Africa. The one commonality in all African cultures is the de-emphasis on individuality and the emphasis on community, the priority of family and creating new life. The feminist is in agreement with everything that breaks the family unit and inhibits procreation. Therefore, the African woman should never seek to locate her liberation within the Eurocentric boundaries of feminism. Within the broader African philosophy, the higher focus is balance over “tick for tack” equality. The feminist equality implies “what men can do; women can do to” as distinct from the African question of “right and wrong.” "ownership of their sexuality, to flaunt immorality. "This shows the flawed paradigm which is found in many aspects of Eurocentrism, where objectives are disconnected from spiritual and biological harmony.

The forms of African women’s rights emerging in various parts of the continent do not grow out of individualism within the context of industrial societies, as did Western feminism. In the West, economic and social trends historically pushed women into more active roles in the economy, and Western feminism has focused on women’s struggle for control over reproduction and sexuality. However, African women have had a different experience. African debates do not focus on theoretical questions, the female body, or sexual identity. African feminism is distinctly heterosexual, supportive of motherhood, and focused on issues of “bread, butter, culture, and power.
 

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Women's rights responses to the injustice against women but seeks solutions within the cultural/biological context, thus it does not ignore or try to deny the biological design of women and men. Certain terms like "Equal rights" have floated around in popular culture for so long that they evade interrogation. Men and women share many roles but some roles have different gender priority, some are exclusive to women (child birth for example.) So if men do not give birth how can the "rights of the women" equally apply to men. Men have to go to war by default, women do not. And while women should have equal access to education, but not to war, not being held responsible for direct conflict. Because the woman gives birth to a nation and such a key to continuing civilization has no place being exposed to the ugliest side of human conflict. An African man does not need his African woman, mother, sister, wife coming home in a body bag in pieces. In the Islamic tradition women, the elderly and children cannot be targeted as a matter of human ethics. An in ancient African societies we see woman traditionally not being engaged in direct conflict, especially when able bodies men are available. While we can agree on commonalities in the struggle for empowering of women we have to also realize in a diverse ethnic-cultural world not every item relevant to women in the west can be transplanted into Africa, Asia or the Middle East.

A central theme in Africa idealism is the quest for harmony and justice. Justice trumps equality every time. And we need clarity on these issues to avoid liberal pitfalls. Both male and female live inside communities, not individual cells, and communities build nations-not individuals. The female energy creates a different world to the world men create. All of this violence we see is partly because of a gender imbalance (Coni and Ms.. Clinton you are excused from this example). There is a myth going around that women's rights /justice is a woman only affair. No that is feminism. Women have agency, but it is a man's problem as well, especially men are 1 out of 2 of the agents of female oppression.
 

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Abortion

"The day a Mother hates what is in her womb is the first day in the death of humanity"

Alik Shahadah


African world views, rituals, art, language and works of wisdom celebrated the complementary relationship between the male and the female. Everything in African cultures from Ethiopia to Congo respect to the centrality of life and pro-life systems (systems that promote life). The harvest, the coming of the rains, the pouring of libation to the ancestors all speaks to the continuity of the life processes. According to Dr. Molefi Kete Asante; professor at Temple University, the overall African philosophy is that life and the reproduction of life sit at the core of human society. Men and women have children who ritualize their parents and ancestors. Individualistic societies selfishly places emphasis on personal rights , called "freedom of choice", over the rights of the unborn, or the community. Choice begins with birth control and using a condom. Not after the fun is finished and a new life has started. It is far more responsible and humane to teach morals than deal with the consequences of a immoral society.

And at the core of this abortion dilemma is again the ugly issue a racial disparity. In the U.S., with African American women five times more likely than non-Hispanic white women to have abortions. Planned Parenthood is notoriously famous for, among many things, being willing to accept donations for the explicit and sole purpose of aborting African-American babies. The Prenatal Nondiscrimination Act (currently in debate) would make it illegal to solicit or accept funds for sex or race selection abortions.

There are situations (rape, incest, severe deformity, health risk) where abortion is necessary. But abortion in Western societies with its over sexualized conduct is more of a birth control, which is used the last resort after a irresponsible night of lustful pleasure. Why should the life in a woman's womb be destroyed because of low maturity or lack of sexual control between consenting adults?

The minute sperm meets egg a process starts, which has one destiny. That destiny is guided by forces outside of our jurisdiction – and that destiny is life. And between Islam, Ifa, Zulu, Ethiopian Orthodox request people respect their bodies and practice marriage. Thus reducing the risk of unplanned pregnancies that cannot be sustained. The mental consequences of abortion are destructive to the woman. No volume of feminism or counseling ever allows a woman to forgive herself after an abortion. They suffer in silence in a world that said it was okay. However, no volume of okay turns an injustice into a justice. The innate mechanism of a woman's biological design were created to sustain life. Abortion is at odds with this innate design and the creates a spiritual void and pain a woman never truly overcomes.
 
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