1. Featured back in Puma package: While the Wildcat hasnt fooled anyone, a little wrinkle should do the trick. In the Puma, Tebow fakes a handoff to himself, then throws a pass to himself coming out of the backfield. Suddenly, Sparano is a genius.
2. Designated spiker. Nobody throws the football into the ground better than Tebow. With the clock ticking down and no timeouts left, Tebow is your man.
3. Moving the chains: Since Tebow hasnt been allowed to gain first downs at quarterback, it would be good visualization practice for him to literally move the chains along the sideline, aiding officials. Might require a waiver from the NFL.
4. Telling Sanchez hes doing great even when he isnt: Actually, Tebow may already be doing this.
5. Left tackle: Sure, the Jets have auditioned Tebow at every skill position. But that just might be the problem. Tebow may not own any actual skills.
6. Celebrity usher: Its a shame to waste such popularity and marketing potential. As a gesture of good will to Personal Seat License holders, Tebow can lead thousands of fans to their seats while the game is going on, between his own plays. Plenty of time for conversation.
7. Fake punt punter: Instead of taking the short snap on a fake punt, Tebow can take the short snap, fake a fake punt, and punt the ball. Not sure what good this will do, but it is sure to create discussion.
8. Challenge-flag tosser: Rex shouldnt have to throw his own red flag. Hes got other things to worry about, such as why his defense is even worse than his offense. Despite well-known accuracy problems, Tebow can be expected to throw the flag successfully onto the field at least 60% of the time.
9. Halftime pep talker: Tebows enthusiasm is welcome and infectious, taken in short bursts. He can come on as the warmup act for Ryan, telling Jet teammates they are not as far out of the game as the scoreboard clearly indicates.
10. Physical therapist for Darrelle Revis: Revis needs a cheerleader, same as everybody else.
11. Gatorade guard: While its highly unlikely the Jets will ever need to dump Gatorade on Ryan this season, its possible some opponent maybe the Patriots, under the orders of spymaster Bill Belichick will steal the Gatorade for their own nefarious purposes.
12. Model: Never too soon to erect a statue for Tebow outside MetLife Stadium, in shirtless Tebowing pose. It will come in handy when Tebow leads Jets to a decent finish this season against an easy late schedule.
