Address_Unknown
Jesus Loves you...Your Cat doesn't. {#Dogset}
Now while alot of the content is steeped in Hollywood lore, not enough credence is given to actual occurrences of paranormal activity since damn near all accounts feature a person(s) trying their utmost to recount the situation to incredulous folk who can't bring themselves to fathom such nonsense or they put too much stock into it and turn it comical and that's even if the recollection is at all genuine since we live in a world that's teeming with attention seekers and swindlers who play up on Human emotion and how gullible we can be if we untether our brains from the reality we know and begin to entertain the stuff we can't explain and most likely will never experience.
Anyone familiar with me and the stories I post on here should know that there is a bit of a read below. Hopefully it will entertain you rather than offend you with it's length (pause) or bore you with it's delivery or pedantic nature in some parts, but hey, That's on you, here's my first hand experience and the shyt that led up to it.
Enter a young(er) Address_Unknown. Early 20's, respectable binge drinking, time allotted hallucinogenic drug user. This was like a year or two after I graduated highschool, spent that hellish summer in Florida and split my time between the Caribbean and the UK, drinking, working and chasing cheeks at a hellish pace, 'cause I was young, free and Wyldin'.
Now the term "Party Animal" seems like a cliched Cac term, but me and my mates at Uni were basically this, without all the homoerotic fratboy shenanigans. We drank, we smoked (They did), we did shrooms and LSD (Me and like one other breh) we chased skirts, we frequented the strip clubs so much, the Dj used to announce us when we slunk into the room; Commonplace behaviour for debauched youth.
Often times we wouldn't even have a plan in mind, we'd just set out in whatever motor we could acquire for the night and just go out and make fun if it wasn't there to be had in an advertised venue, we didn't give a shyt. Now, Full Moon Parties around that era were the things of legend, mainly because there was this ONE spot that always hosted a party, without fail, that were basically drug/alcohol/sex fueled outings akin to them Girls Gone Wild type videos filled with tourists and locals having a good time.
This was ALWAYS a go to event for us, but around this time in our lives, we hadn't any licences and even worse, no cars. We all caught rides and the few times we had a car to drive, we were doing it on the sly, so we always had to be careful, as well as vigilant. Now catching rides in the Caribbean is a mixed bag, especially since Caribbean Islands are mountainous and not everyone is receptive of giving rides to people much less a 4-6 deep motley crew like ours.
However, we were not to be deterred, so when our friend, Boss (He got that name in Primary School for using the word 'Boss' whenever he beat or won something) came back and told us "Yo, mi bredda 'ave one jeep park up in ah di yard, Address, We can fix he?"
Now upon hearing this shyt, we hyped as fukk 'cause we know if we got a motor for ourselves, we can party all night and not have to worry about transportation and time.
Now this was crucial as fukk in this case, 'cause the location of this hallowed venue is a good couple miles on the OTHER side of the Island and it's quite a trek to get there. Not only do you have to climb hills and valleys, there is also a long strip of road DIRECTLY next to the sea that has NO lighting. No street lights, house lights, nothing. The only light you see mainly is yours and hopefully ONLY the light of oncoming cars, but I'll get to that in a bit.
So we all head over to Boss' yard and see the jeep. Me, Boss, our Santo Domingo breh we'll cause Primo 'cause instead of saying 'Amigo' like most spanish folk, he just called everyone 'cuz' in his language, and the Uncle/Nephew duo of Hungryman and Lazyman who all through primary school thought they were cousins until they got older and realized that Hungryman (Uncle) was the uncle of Lazyman, despite Lazyman being OLDER than him on some bullshyt. Anyways, I've identified most of the major players in this story, let's press on.
So we see the jeep, a barely functioning Ragga (Caribbean slang for Junker) with fresh tyres and not much else.
While not the car in question, you've got a proper idea at what we were driving since the anatomy of this car will come into play later, if you're still reading, that is.
So we meet Boss' brother, and just like him, he's Jamaican, skinny as fukk, lanky as hell (6'4) and full on Patois talking, no nonsense type breh.
Boss: "Yo breddah, we ah go forward wid dis hyah skate tonite?"
Bro: "Boy, me did jus check 'e out, transmission slippin, engine a miss, light fuze blow, boy y'all cyah move wid dis sintin' hyah so, plus ain't NONE of ayo gah no licence. Jah no star, leee dis one lone."
Now while the two of them argue back and forth, Hungry and Lazy already looking defeated, I ain't having this shyt, 'cause we've ALL been to them full moon parties. We've all gotten cheeks, gotten into fukkery and had good times there, never a dull moment, so I ain't giving up so easy.
So I go excuse myself, go home then come back with Four Maglite Flashlights with fresh batteries and I go to Holler at Boss' brother, about to level him with my sales pitch for why we need this car and how we plan on working around shyt. He starts going on about the lights, I have Hungry and Lazy jump in the back seat, remove the rag top, and shine the lights infront of the car on both sides giving us enough light in the front while primo and myself use the other lights for whatever.
He shakes his head and starts talking about the transmission slipping, to which Boss steps up, since he's good at driving Standard transmission and while his brother knows this he goes "Wah'pn wen she chip out and yuh gah push 'E, eeeeeeeeeeh?"
I give them boys the siginal, both Hungry and Lazy hop out while Primo takes over headlight duties and aims both lights infront of him, I turn around and aim both light at the back and them boys push until the engine starts, jump back in while it's rolling and we off.
After showing him all this shyt in the yard for damn near an hour, he laughs and says "Yo, Address, yuh does freak me out for a likkle bwoy you know. You either gonna grow up to be a con man or a politician, Which one yuh aiming for?" I hit him with a shrug and go "Ain't they one in the same? I plan ahead sir, I got contingencies." So while he's impressed enough that we can operate the jeep, he hits us with the kicker, which I guess he thought would have shut us down and made us reconsider.
"Wah'pn wen Babylon come dung pon yuh and ain't none of yuh boys gah licence, wah then?" I excuse myself with a smile and return with a duffle bag and a case that I drop on the ground. One carpenter tools, the other is a jackhammer in it's case. He looks at them confused for a moment, but I continue my pitch. "The cops hold us up, I'll just say that I was carrying these tools to my uncle who's a contractor and is renovating a house within the same area as the party, so If I'm stopped and they realize that's where I'm headed, that's what I tell 'em."
He shakes his head and laughs, clearly amused that we're campaigning so hard for this piece of shyt jeep and he prolly sees a bit of us in him and his brother since he's a self proclaimed "Gyalist" (Ladies Man) and we all 21 and up, he shrugs and goes "Alright, I ah go mek you 'ave ee, buh if dem ask where ya get 'im from, nah me, Seen star?"
We dap and he gives us the keys and we damn near start squealing like girls cause we all got high hopes of shyt being a good time like we always have but times 10.
Fastforward to 6pm, we all at Boss' house. Jeep's gassed up, we got the flash lights rolling, got the tools and my alibi sharpened and ready, we all stinking up the place with our individual colognes that we all went too heavy on, everybody got "Bread and Knives" (Money and Weapons), we good, so we set on out and begin our journey.
We all jump out and give Boss a push until the engine turns over
and we deftly jump into that bytch like we the 88 yardie bobsled team when they finally got they shyt together and we off. Now while the ride in and of itself was pretty uneventful, having only to jump out once when the engine started to stall going up a hill with a few cars infront of it so we jumped out and pushed it up, we clear all the main hills and now we driving on that long stretch of road, listening to the sea waves crash on the rocks, did I mention the rocks and how many lives it took?
What makes the stretch of road so infamous back in them days (This was like 2002-2005) was the amount of people that died along it's stretch, by either flipping their cars into the sea and drowning or flying out of their windshields and fukking themselves badly on the jagged rocks at the sandless shores. From when we were kids up until then, we've all heard the tales of folk getting fukked up there, and while any normal person would just chaulk it up to people either speeding, being distracted without any street lights or getting blinded by oncoming car's highbeams and swerving off the road....folks like to go on about how "Haunted" that strip is and what sort of bullshyt creature/spirits/jumbies you'd meet along the way that like to chase and kill travellers.
Various baddies like the "Cowfoot Woman" who stands still and talks to you in a deep voice and if you anger her, chases after you with the most scariest, limp/shuffle you'll ever see since one of her legs got caught in a factory machine and some mad doctor grafted a cowfoot to her thigh. My Granddad told me and my cousins about her when we were kids. He said that the dragging of her foot along with the chain she had tied to it was one of the most terrifying things he's ever heard, but then again he was laughing when he said it and my Grandpops (god rest his soul) was a serious man so I always questioned that shyt.
There was also the tale of the "Woman in the wedding dress" who was supposedly catching a ride on the way to her wedding which she was late for and got hit by a speeding car that kept it moving, so now she haunts the strip of road, waiting for passengers to pick her up in her tattered, frayed wedding gown and either spins the wheel towards the direction of the sea and drown you, or chase after you, screaming and howling in your ear if you manage to realize who she is and what she plans on doing when you try to run away from her.
Now the term "Party Animal" seems like a cliched Cac term, but me and my mates at Uni were basically this, without all the homoerotic fratboy shenanigans. We drank, we smoked (They did), we did shrooms and LSD (Me and like one other breh) we chased skirts, we frequented the strip clubs so much, the Dj used to announce us when we slunk into the room; Commonplace behaviour for debauched youth.
Often times we wouldn't even have a plan in mind, we'd just set out in whatever motor we could acquire for the night and just go out and make fun if it wasn't there to be had in an advertised venue, we didn't give a shyt. Now, Full Moon Parties around that era were the things of legend, mainly because there was this ONE spot that always hosted a party, without fail, that were basically drug/alcohol/sex fueled outings akin to them Girls Gone Wild type videos filled with tourists and locals having a good time.
This was ALWAYS a go to event for us, but around this time in our lives, we hadn't any licences and even worse, no cars. We all caught rides and the few times we had a car to drive, we were doing it on the sly, so we always had to be careful, as well as vigilant. Now catching rides in the Caribbean is a mixed bag, especially since Caribbean Islands are mountainous and not everyone is receptive of giving rides to people much less a 4-6 deep motley crew like ours.
However, we were not to be deterred, so when our friend, Boss (He got that name in Primary School for using the word 'Boss' whenever he beat or won something) came back and told us "Yo, mi bredda 'ave one jeep park up in ah di yard, Address, We can fix he?"
My Brother has a jeep at home we can possibly use, Address, Can we fix it?
Now this was crucial as fukk in this case, 'cause the location of this hallowed venue is a good couple miles on the OTHER side of the Island and it's quite a trek to get there. Not only do you have to climb hills and valleys, there is also a long strip of road DIRECTLY next to the sea that has NO lighting. No street lights, house lights, nothing. The only light you see mainly is yours and hopefully ONLY the light of oncoming cars, but I'll get to that in a bit.
So we all head over to Boss' yard and see the jeep. Me, Boss, our Santo Domingo breh we'll cause Primo 'cause instead of saying 'Amigo' like most spanish folk, he just called everyone 'cuz' in his language, and the Uncle/Nephew duo of Hungryman and Lazyman who all through primary school thought they were cousins until they got older and realized that Hungryman (Uncle) was the uncle of Lazyman, despite Lazyman being OLDER than him on some bullshyt. Anyways, I've identified most of the major players in this story, let's press on.
So we see the jeep, a barely functioning Ragga (Caribbean slang for Junker) with fresh tyres and not much else.
So we meet Boss' brother, and just like him, he's Jamaican, skinny as fukk, lanky as hell (6'4) and full on Patois talking, no nonsense type breh.
Boss: "Yo breddah, we ah go forward wid dis hyah skate tonite?"
Yo Brother, can we move with this car tonite?"
Bro: "Boy, me did jus check 'e out, transmission slippin, engine a miss, light fuze blow, boy y'all cyah move wid dis sintin' hyah so, plus ain't NONE of ayo gah no licence. Jah no star, leee dis one lone."
I checked it out and the transmission and engine is giving problems, the car has no lights. Y'all can't moving with this properly, especially since y'all don't have licences. Leave this alone
So I go excuse myself, go home then come back with Four Maglite Flashlights with fresh batteries and I go to Holler at Boss' brother, about to level him with my sales pitch for why we need this car and how we plan on working around shyt. He starts going on about the lights, I have Hungry and Lazy jump in the back seat, remove the rag top, and shine the lights infront of the car on both sides giving us enough light in the front while primo and myself use the other lights for whatever.
He shakes his head and starts talking about the transmission slipping, to which Boss steps up, since he's good at driving Standard transmission and while his brother knows this he goes "Wah'pn wen she chip out and yuh gah push 'E, eeeeeeeeeeh?"
What happens when it stalls and you have to push start, hmmmmmmmm?
After showing him all this shyt in the yard for damn near an hour, he laughs and says "Yo, Address, yuh does freak me out for a likkle bwoy you know. You either gonna grow up to be a con man or a politician, Which one yuh aiming for?" I hit him with a shrug and go "Ain't they one in the same? I plan ahead sir, I got contingencies." So while he's impressed enough that we can operate the jeep, he hits us with the kicker, which I guess he thought would have shut us down and made us reconsider.
"Wah'pn wen Babylon come dung pon yuh and ain't none of yuh boys gah licence, wah then?" I excuse myself with a smile and return with a duffle bag and a case that I drop on the ground. One carpenter tools, the other is a jackhammer in it's case. He looks at them confused for a moment, but I continue my pitch. "The cops hold us up, I'll just say that I was carrying these tools to my uncle who's a contractor and is renovating a house within the same area as the party, so If I'm stopped and they realize that's where I'm headed, that's what I tell 'em."
He shakes his head and laughs, clearly amused that we're campaigning so hard for this piece of shyt jeep and he prolly sees a bit of us in him and his brother since he's a self proclaimed "Gyalist" (Ladies Man) and we all 21 and up, he shrugs and goes "Alright, I ah go mek you 'ave ee, buh if dem ask where ya get 'im from, nah me, Seen star?"
Alright, I'll let you go with it, but if you get caught, I had nothing to do with this, got that champ?
Fastforward to 6pm, we all at Boss' house. Jeep's gassed up, we got the flash lights rolling, got the tools and my alibi sharpened and ready, we all stinking up the place with our individual colognes that we all went too heavy on, everybody got "Bread and Knives" (Money and Weapons), we good, so we set on out and begin our journey.
What makes the stretch of road so infamous back in them days (This was like 2002-2005) was the amount of people that died along it's stretch, by either flipping their cars into the sea and drowning or flying out of their windshields and fukking themselves badly on the jagged rocks at the sandless shores. From when we were kids up until then, we've all heard the tales of folk getting fukked up there, and while any normal person would just chaulk it up to people either speeding, being distracted without any street lights or getting blinded by oncoming car's highbeams and swerving off the road....folks like to go on about how "Haunted" that strip is and what sort of bullshyt creature/spirits/jumbies you'd meet along the way that like to chase and kill travellers.
Various baddies like the "Cowfoot Woman" who stands still and talks to you in a deep voice and if you anger her, chases after you with the most scariest, limp/shuffle you'll ever see since one of her legs got caught in a factory machine and some mad doctor grafted a cowfoot to her thigh. My Granddad told me and my cousins about her when we were kids. He said that the dragging of her foot along with the chain she had tied to it was one of the most terrifying things he's ever heard, but then again he was laughing when he said it and my Grandpops (god rest his soul) was a serious man so I always questioned that shyt.
There was also the tale of the "Woman in the wedding dress" who was supposedly catching a ride on the way to her wedding which she was late for and got hit by a speeding car that kept it moving, so now she haunts the strip of road, waiting for passengers to pick her up in her tattered, frayed wedding gown and either spins the wheel towards the direction of the sea and drown you, or chase after you, screaming and howling in your ear if you manage to realize who she is and what she plans on doing when you try to run away from her.
I peaked at the party and remember getting really worried because I thought the moon was moving closer to earth because of how big it looked and I was freaking out because everyone seemed to not care), I'm shining the lights infront of the road, and then I started to get giddy and keep just one light on the road, while the other started exploring our location as we drove.
Then 
Cause as I'm shining my second light ahead of the car, over at this distinct but dark shape at edge of the road and this happens
