On the last episode of The Greatest Show on Earth.....
The GOAT franchise Boss Angeles Lakers, lost in the wilderness of tank wars, were resting the hopes of the franchise on the shoulders of young players, misfits, a megalomaniacal cokehead, and his puppet GM and cronies whom also doubled as bartenders. Hope was little, and losses were many. But from beyond the basketball grave, reaching out from the land of the basketball gawds.....the one shooting gawd Kobe Bean Bryant sparked the flame that would scorch all of the bad and even the good within GOAT franchise.
The matriarch of the Buss family, Jeanie, squared off with her out of control brother Jim in a battle that would set the stage for the next era of Lakers basketball. With Jeanie’s victory, all seemed as if it would change for the better. The point gawd Magic Johnson took the seat once held by her brother and was now at the head of basketball operations. Upon the blessing of Kobe, his former agent and low budget Rob Lowe looking alike Rob Pelinka became the GM. DLo, who had yet to show his promise, was traded but gained was Killa Kuzma aka tall Jordan Clarkson. All of the bad money signings from were gone and GOAT franchise was now ready for the next step.
Summer 2018, in a clandestine midnight rendezvous with the point gawd, the next era of Lakers basketball had begun. The winds of the Midwest blew into Boss Angeles and riding behind it with his invading army was King LeBron James and the Klutch Kingdom. With the blessings from all the Laker gawds his ascent to the throne of GOAT franchise was complete, LeBron was now crowned His Imperial Majesty of all professional sports Big Hollywood Bron James. However it was not to be a peaceful maiden voyage for H.I.M. Big Hollywood Bron.
Surrounding the Emperor, was the remnants of the past regime. Zo, BI Baracus, Killa Kuz, and Josh the Hitman Hart of da Streetz to name a few. Young soldiers who were hardened in the ways of tank battles, but were still learning their way to the mountain top while maintaining health. However young they were, they were of great value. Alongside them, were the Muds, elite goons specialized in occasional bonehead plays, occasional spectacular plays, and no consistency to speak of. Super Smacked Cool Beas, McGee, Born Ready, and former Celtic enemy Razor Rajon Rondo. And to lead this bunch, LeBron’s fellow draftmate Luke Walton. Many questioned the moves made by the point gawd, but for now doubt was mostly set aside.
After a shaky road to begin, GOAT franchise entered Christmas as a top 5 seed. The Lakers went on to handily defeat the reigning champion Golden State Warriors. However, for the first time, LeBron would suffer an injury that would keep him out. As the Emperor lie, more players began to get injured, and the team sank well below where it had been. But there was something deeper...
The GOAT franchise had made a fateful decision to incorporate the Klutch Kingdom within the Lakers Empire. Just as LeBron needed the blessing of the Laker gawds to hold the throne, so too did GOAT franchise need to make a sacrifice for the Klutch Kingdom for the Union to be complete. The King of the Basketball Swamps Anthony Davis, a vassal of the Kingdom of Klutch, had grown tired of wallowing in the mud and grime of the NBA. In a desperate plea, he reached out for help from Klutch. AD demanded to be traded to the GOAT franchise Boss Angeles Lakers.
In an instant, the little bonds that were built in the locker room would be destroyed. The point gawd, again in questionable fashion, offered nearly the whole team to New Orleans in exchange for Anthony Davis. Bitter from their football loss against the Rams, and with sneaky salt throwers like ratovich and cacban in the shadows working phones. The King of the Swamp was barred from a trade to GOAT franchise.
But by now, the damage was done....chemistry eroded, and once again the GOAT franchise, found itself on the verge of another tank war. But then the Emperor returned, now in playoff mode. With such a proclamation being made, no one within the Laker stanbase knew what that meant. But for the millions, and millions, of brons stains it meant hope. After several games and many embarrassments, the weight of GOAT franchise proved to be too great for LeBron alone. And he, along with his playoff mode, deactivated for the season. Tank wars had begun again. And hope once again was lost.
Before the season could end, the point gawd, in his final crazy act, stepped down from the helm and renounced all responsibilities for the Lakers. Citing differences with low budget Rob Lowe, a desire to tweet more, as well as the beginnings of what was to come, Magic Johnson, scandalized, just left. And born from the chaos was Jeanie and the front thotfice. With her bottom bytch Linda ridin, and her ex fiancé Phil lurkin, they set out to prove the world wrong.............
...:::The Greatest Show on Earth:::...
Brought to you by the GOAT franchise in all professional sports your Boss Angeles Lakers. :wowderas:
Sponsored in part by the GOAT stanchise, LWO aka Lakeset GOATgang aka GOAT Row Records
Twitter: @the_real_lwoAnd contributions from posters like you....
Presents
2 of Amerikaz Most Wanted
After a whirlwind season that saw another losing season for GOAT franchise, all parties were hard at work to finally end this long standing madness which was wrecking the gold standard in all professional sports. This was not a welcome sign for the rest of the bytch ass hatin ass NBA...
After the mid season destruction of the AD trade demands, the deal has finally been done and AD is a Laker. All of the Tank Dogs but Kuz went to the basketball swamps to take over their franchise, now known as the Pelakers. GOAT franchise was now back, and hungry for more. Second son of the one shooting gawd, Kawhi Leonard, had always been an admired enemy amongst GOAT stanchise from his days as a Spur. His ascent to become King of the North saw him fulfill much of his promise. And now the opportunity had come for him to join his basketball father’s franchise and learn the ways of the shooting gawd. :wowkobe:
It was clear, from the team to its stans, that Kawhi would insure Lakers dominance for many years to come. In an instant, Kawhi held the basketball world in the palm of his hands. Franchises were held hostage, clandestine meetings took place, and the smoke and mirrors generated brought everything to a standstill. Knowing and hoping that Kawhi would be the next great Laker, GOAT franchise continued to wait. But all seemed assured, H.I.M. simply sat at his throne and enjoyed tacos on Tuesday.
At the final hour, hope gave way to betrayal. The longtime lowly clippers, with their functional cokehead owner aiming ambitiously for the throne of Boss Angeles, made a last minute move and traded for overrated bum george paul. And soon after, the chosen one became an enemy. By means of collusion and fukkery a new villainous kingdom has arisen. Posing a direct challenge to H.I.M. Big Hollywood Bron James, a mega duel has now been set for the spring. But with all of the time wasted, a formidable team was still assembled that gave the Lakers an edge against this new evil foe. :rajspit:
The silent war between Jeanie and Logo has finally hit the Lakers where it hurt. But the team is still poised for a championship. A reinvigorated Boogie would join AD and Rondo to recreate the magic they had in New Orleans a few years earlier. Then bad fortune struck and once again, Boogie Cousins was sidelined with another major leg injury and BM fukkery.
The one perceived advantage that the Lakers had against the clippers is now weakened. Tough decisions now had to be made in order to ensure that the team could still stay the course. And so, in one final act of fukkery, the excommunicated and hated Dwight Howard has made his return to the GOAT franchise Boss Angeles Lakers to the disgust of the whole stanbase.
But the roster is now set.....no turning back.....the pressure is on for one of the most hated Laker rosters ever, with plenty of bad blood for the whole NBA to match. Will the GOAT franchise win an NBA championship for the first time since 2010? Will LeBron accept the challenge to his throne from Kawhi? Will AD rise and become an MVP and the best in the league? Find out all this and more in the latest episode of the Greatest Show on Earth!
PG: Razor Rondo/Lex ‘ruso/Quinn Cook’em
SG: Green Ranger/KCP/A Swagley
SF: H.I.M. Big Hollywood Bron/Killa Kuz/Jared Tubley
PF: AD/Paid da Kostas/Troy Daniels
C: D12/Hoes don’t ride for free McGee/Boogie Cousins
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