101 Bible Oddities

[RageKage]

101 of the craziest, strangest, most ridiculous Bible absurdities

In my last article I took a critical look at the teachings of Jesus, in this article I’ll extend that to the Bible itself. As a reference guide I’ve used The Skeptics Annotated Bible which I highly recommend you check out. The Bible is a book of claims, not a book of facts. It is […]

lifelessons.co

Some pretty interesting stuff in here many of us may just gloss over or not have considered at all

98. Cain gets a wife from outta nowhere​

Cain is worried after killing Abel and says, “Every one who finds me shall slay me.” This is a strange concern since there were only two other humans alive at the time — his parents! 4:14

“And Cain knew his wife.” Except the only woman on earth was Eve his mother.

94. God kills everything to make the world less violent​

God was angry because “the earth was filled with violence.” So he killed every living thing to make the world less violent.


On the last point, is God the OG Thanos?

 

[African Peasant]

 

[murksiderock]

Believe in a text stolen and rewritten many times over by Europeans, brehs...

 

[Seoul Gleou]

92. God enslaves the Jews (his chosen people) for 400 years​

Why would God enslave the jews (his chosen people) for 400 years? Genesis 15:13

95. God repents that he made man​

“And God saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually. And it repented the LORD that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him at his heart” Genesis 6:5

29. Jesus forbids the taking of any kind of oath​

Jesus forbids the taking of any kind of oath. Yet Christians in courtrooms throughout the United States place their right hand on the Bible swear to tell the truth. 5:34-37

“I tell you, do not swear an oath at all: either by heaven, for it is God’s throne; or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one” Matthew 5:34-37

 

[RageKage]

67. You can’t go to church if your testicles are damaged, or if your penis has been cut off​

“He that is wounded in the stones, or hath his privy member cut off, shall not enter into the congregation of the Lord” Deuteronomy 23:1

 

[RageKage]

29. Jesus forbids the taking of any kind of oath​

Jesus forbids the taking of any kind of oath. Yet Christians in courtrooms throughout the United States place their right hand on the Bible swear to tell the truth. 5:34-37

“I tell you, do not swear an oath at all: either by heaven, for it is God’s throne; or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one” Matthew 5:34-37

Can you invoke this passage of the bible to avoid giving sworn testimony in court?

U might be able to use that to avoid Jury duty, cite that and watch judge's head spin and explode trying to contemplate a resolution

 

[Thsnnor]

*sigh* Out of context like a big dog. When I get a minute ill correct some of these......

 

[Leasy]

Crazy how this book took over the world.

 

[jdubnyce]

Writings of crazy insane men

 

[CouldntBeMeTho]

*sigh* Out of context like a big dog. When I get a minute ill correct some of these......

if everyones taking it out of context explain how one book can produce so many different denominations, each with their own interpretation of the same silly scribblings..

 

[Professor K.]

The most absurd chapter of the entire Bible is Genesis 18. God pulls up on Abraham with the homies(the same homies who nearly get raped in Sodom and Gomorrah in the next chapter), eats bread, gets his feet washed, tells Sarah she's getting pregnant while flexing about how nothing is too extraordinary for him, walks around with Abraham and tells him he will go down to Sodom and Gomorrah to see if it's as bad as people say it is. The entire chapter speaks about God as if he's there, straight up. Not a vision or a representative or messenger or nothing. Just Him, right there kicking it. Rep to whoever can even try to explain that shyt

 

[MMS]

The most absurd chapter of the entire Bible is Genesis 18. God pulls up on Abraham with the homies(the same homies who nearly get raped in Sodom and Gomorrah in the next chapter), eats bread, gets his feet washed, tells Sarah she's getting pregnant while flexing about how nothing is too extraordinary for him, walks around with Abraham and tells him he will go down to Sodom and Gomorrah to see if it's as bad as people say it is. The entire chapter speaks about God as if he's there, straight up. Not a vision or a representative or messenger or nothing. Just Him, right there kicking it. Rep to whoever can even try to explain that shyt

he was there and he was kickin it

Genesis 18:27 Hebrew Text Analysis

biblehub.com

you need to read like how i read it though

https://www.thecoli.com/threads/how-many-of-yall-believe-in-god.972281/page-9#post-49129509

 

[Thsnnor]

if everyones taking it out of context explain how one book can produce so many different denominations, each with their own interpretation of the same silly scribblings..

Easy. People choose what they see and what they don't see all while taking what they want and leaving the rest.

The Bible is a journey and people walk the path for a bit find something they like and make camp. For example, the prosperity gospel.... cults.... the slave Bible ( had less than 200 pages total)....

 

[TEH]

67. You can’t go to church if your testicles are damaged, or if your penis has been cut off​

“He that is wounded in the stones, or hath his privy member cut off, shall not enter into the congregation of the Lord” Deuteronomy 23:1

There was no church in Deuteronomy. No church before Jesus.

 

[TEH]

The most absurd chapter of the entire Bible is Genesis 18. God pulls up on Abraham with the homies(the same homies who nearly get raped in Sodom and Gomorrah in the next chapter), eats bread, gets his feet washed, tells Sarah she's getting pregnant while flexing about how nothing is too extraordinary for him, walks around with Abraham and tells him he will go down to Sodom and Gomorrah to see if it's as bad as people say it is. The entire chapter speaks about God as if he's there, straight up. Not a vision or a representative or messenger or nothing. Just Him, right there kicking it. Rep to whoever can even try to explain that shyt

God visits a few times in the Old Testament. That’s why the concept of God taking on human flesh isn’t so wild for those who actually read the Bible.