I also keep hearing about forgiveness and not holding grudges or letting bygone be bygones but how is that possible when the person you are forgiving or holding a grudge against doesn't even understand what they did wrong.
they don't see anything wrong in their actions or behavior enough to adjust it or for them to realize that they hurt someone else. So what is the point? I hear some people say forgiveness is for the self but personally speaking and this is something personal here, since I was a kid, I have been hurt in ways where I've been violated (I wasnt molested) by other people in ways that have fukked up my psyche. In fact, it may have led to my anxiety and depression issues. So I'm already rolling with baggage that I've been trying to throw to the wayside. So I'm already a guy who is struggling and has been trying to be well for a long time. A lot of things that people find easy to do such as opening up to others and socializing, I am not all that fond of doing. Although I'm nice and all where people approach me for some weird reason where I can make friends I guess, I have a problem getting close to people or I tend to keep in contact people as much and etc. It's because I'm afraid of letting someone in and them fukking hurting me or betraying my trust. The thing is I don't even hate the people or persons that done that to me. The thing that hurts me is that 9 times out of 10, they never understood what they did wrong enough to realize that they hurt me and how bad they did to enough to make them not do the same shyt again to me or to somebody else. They just kept on trucking on some fukk you shyt where I just develop a feeling of anger towards them like no remorse so I have to give you what you gave me so you know how the fukk I feel.