Everybody's relationship won't be the same. What works for some doesn't work for everybody, but in this case. He's talking about a woman not doing her duty as a wife. If she's not giving it up, he's likely to mess up. If you can't understand it, or don't want to, don't be surprised by the results.
It's common sense stuff. The Bible does talk about the roles of husbands and wives. Neither one are suppose to hold out from each other (sexually) unless there is a really good reason, and then they should not do it for too long, because we all know, we have urges. We're grown. Own it.