Hello.
I have a very simple question. Obviously there are many factors that play into whether someone like you or not, and physical attraction is a big one despite what people say. But does that not also mean that race play a role? I ask because I am 25 years old, and live in a very white part of Canada with few black people. And my " proper dating" history has been 0 up to this day.
I'm not self pitying about it, because I know there are even white guys without girlfriends. But I'm very confused as to what the problem is with *me*. Everyone always tells me that I'm confident, good looking, funny, honest and a good guy. But I seem to always fail with girls. Now I've had girls come on to me in my life, so I'm not saying that I don't get female attention. But it seems that when I go for girls, I always get rejected. I asked out two girls at work before(I know, I know) and they both said yes, but then quit suddenly and never spoke to me again. I asked out another one recently, and she said no, but kept talking to me and I distanced myself, to the point where she asked if I was angry at her. Anyway this recent girl and I still work together, but it's hard seeing her around and sometimes I still make play at her, and each time she says no. I feel like an idiot.
Now. My overall question to you guys, not girl, because I know that it can be quite different for women. Is whether or not you feel that race has played a negative role in your social life, dating outside your race and or whether it's a "confidence" issue. I am raised by African parents and was taught to never put hands on a woman without her permission. So the only thing I ever do when I'm interested in a girl, is little things like compliment her, put my hand on her back while talking, etc.
Am I doing something wrong? Or am I just not meeting enough people? I have a car(it's a van), go to school, work and stay in shape. So I'm a little puzzled as to why I'm constantly failing. I don't want to become bitter or cynical, but I know that outside of dating, white people still ask me stupid questions and have stereotyped views of me at first too. So I'm wondering why it wouldn't be different in dating. Thanks.
I have a very simple question. Obviously there are many factors that play into whether someone like you or not, and physical attraction is a big one despite what people say. But does that not also mean that race play a role? I ask because I am 25 years old, and live in a very white part of Canada with few black people. And my " proper dating" history has been 0 up to this day.
I'm not self pitying about it, because I know there are even white guys without girlfriends. But I'm very confused as to what the problem is with *me*. Everyone always tells me that I'm confident, good looking, funny, honest and a good guy. But I seem to always fail with girls. Now I've had girls come on to me in my life, so I'm not saying that I don't get female attention. But it seems that when I go for girls, I always get rejected. I asked out two girls at work before(I know, I know) and they both said yes, but then quit suddenly and never spoke to me again. I asked out another one recently, and she said no, but kept talking to me and I distanced myself, to the point where she asked if I was angry at her. Anyway this recent girl and I still work together, but it's hard seeing her around and sometimes I still make play at her, and each time she says no. I feel like an idiot.
Now. My overall question to you guys, not girl, because I know that it can be quite different for women. Is whether or not you feel that race has played a negative role in your social life, dating outside your race and or whether it's a "confidence" issue. I am raised by African parents and was taught to never put hands on a woman without her permission. So the only thing I ever do when I'm interested in a girl, is little things like compliment her, put my hand on her back while talking, etc.
Am I doing something wrong? Or am I just not meeting enough people? I have a car(it's a van), go to school, work and stay in shape. So I'm a little puzzled as to why I'm constantly failing. I don't want to become bitter or cynical, but I know that outside of dating, white people still ask me stupid questions and have stereotyped views of me at first too. So I'm wondering why it wouldn't be different in dating. Thanks.
