Come in here an post that real life ether

[Racked Up]

One time back in middle school....
this lookin chick walked in late
room was quiet n shyt then out of nowhere.....
a nikka yelled "O my dam!!!" wit the face


class:
teacher face:
teacher on the inside:
chick:
nikka that yelled:


yall post them stories.....

 

[General Mills]

This is long but. . . Oh well. You ever fukk a girl that nobody is supposed to know about? A fat girl. . .

Well I was in the Navy. We were getting ready to ship out for three weeks and I was in this local bar trolling for some strange before we left the next morning. All of a sudden this chick walks in. . Big ol titays but bigger gut.

But she was down for the get down. She asked for me to drive her home. . On the way she says how about a hotel I figure why not. I will never see her again and I will get a chance to run up in something. For some reason that night I was a super machine. I fukked ol girl all night. Dropped her ass off at home in the morning and went to the ship. I never even told her my real name. . only my nickname.

Fast forward three weeks later. What me and my boys used to do was what we called " ugly wife watch " When the ship was pulling into the berth we would chill outside and look at all the ugly navy wives on the pier waiting for their husbands. Well my homie goes. . WE GOT A WINNER!! LOOK AT THIS TRAVESTY!

I grab the binoculars. Its ol girl!! She is out there with a sheer white and lace outfit on. Short ass skirt and her titays were out everywhere. So was her stomach. My boys are all howling! They cant wait to see who she is coming to see.

Im scared brehs. And I am confused. HOW THE HELL DID SHE FIND ME? Found out later she knew that my ship was pulling out the next day. . I told her that. So she went to the Base Quarterdeck and they told her what ship left on what day. She then found out where we were berthed at. . She then walked in the parking lot and saw my car so she knew where I would be and when we were coming back. This chick CSI'd the game to find me.

But she still does not know my name. BUT! BUT!! Never underestimate the power of nikkas. We pull in. She walks up the ship. . . All the black dudes CANNOT WAIT to see who she is coming for. . She gets on but does not know my name. She is trying to describe to the guy on watch who I am. . . Then she mentions my car. THEY ALL KNOW.

I am not ashamed to admit. . I ran. . . I hid in a empty rack. . Closed the curtains and went to sleep. They were calling my name on the intercom for like 30 min straight. The wolves on the ship were ruthless. They looked for me everywhere and they INVITED her on the ship. About 30 dudes were chilling in the mess hall with her waiting on me to show. I was

Long story short. They started talking to her. . She told them how I fukked her like she had never been fukked.. How I was amazing and that she wanted me again. Told them she did not have a car. She walked on the base. Which had to be at least 5 miles. ( i felt bad about that. ) She ended up staying on the ship waiting for me for 3 hours!

The next morning I crawl out of the rack and the wolves descended on my ass. I denied denied denied. . But I was caught brehs.

 

[Sinnerman]

^

 

[BlvdBrawler]

This is long but. . . Oh well. You ever fukk a girl that nobody is supposed to know about? A fat girl. . .

Well I was in the Navy. We were getting ready to ship out for three weeks and I was in this local bar trolling for some strange before we left the next morning. All of a sudden this chick walks in. . Big ol titays but bigger gut.

But she was down for the get down. She asked for me to drive her home. . On the way she says how about a hotel I figure why not. I will never see her again and I will get a chance to run up in something. For some reason that night I was a super machine. I fukked ol girl all night. Dropped her ass off at home in the morning and went to the ship. I never even told her my real name. . only my nickname.

Fast forward three weeks later. What me and my boys used to do was what we called " ugly wife watch " When the ship was pulling into the berth we would chill outside and look at all the ugly navy wives on the pier waiting for their husbands. Well my homie goes. . WE GOT A WINNER!! LOOK AT THIS TRAVESTY!

I grab the binoculars. Its ol girl!! She is out there with a sheer white and lace outfit on. Short ass skirt and her titays were out everywhere. So was her stomach. My boys are all howling! They cant wait to see who she is coming to see.

Im scared brehs. And I am confused. HOW THE HELL DID SHE FIND ME? Found out later she knew that my ship was pulling out the next day. . I told her that. So she went to the Base Quarterdeck and they told her what ship left on what day. She then found out where we were berthed at. . She then walked in the parking lot and saw my car so she knew where I would be and when we were coming back. This chick CSI'd the game to find me.

But she still does not know my name. BUT! BUT!! Never underestimate the power of nikkas. We pull in. She walks up the ship. . . All the black dudes CANNOT WAIT to see who she is coming for. . She gets on but does not know my name. She is trying to describe to the guy on watch who I am. . . Then she mentions my car. THEY ALL KNOW.

I am not ashamed to admit. . I ran. . . I hid in a empty rack. . Closed the curtains and went to sleep. They were calling my name on the intercom for like 30 min straight. The wolves on the ship were ruthless. They looked for me everywhere and they INVITED her on the ship. About 30 dudes were chilling in the mess hall with her waiting on me to show. I was

Long story short. They started talking to her. . She told them how I fukked her like she had never been fukked.. How I was amazing and that she wanted me again. Told them she did not have a car. She walked on the base. Which had to be at least 5 miles. ( i felt bad about that. ) She ended up staying on the ship waiting for me for 3 hours!

The next morning I crawl out of the rack and the wolves descended on my ass. I denied denied denied. . But I was caught brehs.

Damn my man that is hilarious.

 

[Racked Up]

str8 hunted u down for it



i would probly b feelin an at the same dam time

 

[twan83]

Here is one
I went on a date with a girl from POF she look bad as hell but when i picked her up

I was like SHE BIG AS A WHALE
I knew better though since it was only face pics but anyways
I was like its cool she could be a sweetheart size dont matter and it didnt really either but something caught my attention though

She came to my car i drove at that time a SUV she sat in my car NO JOKE MY CAR WAS TILTING TO HER SIDE

Im like ah shyt. Made it kind of hard to drive so we go to the movies. she didnt order no food or anything but everybody looking at me like

Man we had to sit in the HANDICAP SEATS so i was like it is what it is. Were Watching 2012 my ass fell asleep on her. Man she was comfortable to sleep on i woke up at the end of the movie in between her chest didnt even realize it.

Long story short: Being a nice guy that i was i still took her out went to movies and she said im not her type cuz im TOO SMALL

 

[nalej]

that story is hilarious General.

 

[Racked Up]

Here is one
I went on a date with a girl from POF she look bad as hell but when i picked her up

I was like SHE BIG AS A WHALE
I knew better though since it was only face pics but anyways
I was like its cool she could be a sweetheart size dont matter and it didnt really either but something caught my attention though

She came to my car i drove at that time a SUV she sat in my car NO JOKE MY CAR WAS TILTING TO HER SIDE

Im like ah shyt. Made it kind of hard to drive so we go to the movies. she didnt order no food or anything but everybody looking at me like

Man we had to sit in the HANDICAP SEATS so i was like it is what it is. Were Watching 2012 my ass fell asleep on her. Man she was comfortable to sleep on i woke up at the end of the movie in between her chest didnt even realize it.

Long story short: Being a nice guy that i was i still took her out went to movies and she said im not her type cuz im TOO SMALL

 

[Racked Up]

that story is hilarious General.

mills stories ben havin me rollin all day lol

 

[thelonious21]

This is long but. . . Oh well. You ever fukk a girl that nobody is supposed to know about? A fat girl. . .

Well I was in the Navy. We were getting ready to ship out for three weeks and I was in this local bar trolling for some strange before we left the next morning. All of a sudden this chick walks in. . Big ol titays but bigger gut.

But she was down for the get down. She asked for me to drive her home. . On the way she says how about a hotel I figure why not. I will never see her again and I will get a chance to run up in something. For some reason that night I was a super machine. I fukked ol girl all night. Dropped her ass off at home in the morning and went to the ship. I never even told her my real name. . only my nickname.

Fast forward three weeks later. What me and my boys used to do was what we called " ugly wife watch " When the ship was pulling into the berth we would chill outside and look at all the ugly navy wives on the pier waiting for their husbands. Well my homie goes. . WE GOT A WINNER!! LOOK AT THIS TRAVESTY!

I grab the binoculars. Its ol girl!! She is out there with a sheer white and lace outfit on. Short ass skirt and her titays were out everywhere. So was her stomach. My boys are all howling! They cant wait to see who she is coming to see.

Im scared brehs. And I am confused. HOW THE HELL DID SHE FIND ME? Found out later she knew that my ship was pulling out the next day. . I told her that. So she went to the Base Quarterdeck and they told her what ship left on what day. She then found out where we were berthed at. . She then walked in the parking lot and saw my car so she knew where I would be and when we were coming back. This chick CSI'd the game to find me.

But she still does not know my name. BUT! BUT!! Never underestimate the power of nikkas. We pull in. She walks up the ship. . . All the black dudes CANNOT WAIT to see who she is coming for. . She gets on but does not know my name. She is trying to describe to the guy on watch who I am. . . Then she mentions my car. THEY ALL KNOW.

I am not ashamed to admit. . I ran. . . I hid in a empty rack. . Closed the curtains and went to sleep. They were calling my name on the intercom for like 30 min straight. The wolves on the ship were ruthless. They looked for me everywhere and they INVITED her on the ship. About 30 dudes were chilling in the mess hall with her waiting on me to show. I was

Long story short. They started talking to her. . She told them how I fukked her like she had never been fukked.. How I was amazing and that she wanted me again. Told them she did not have a car. She walked on the base. Which had to be at least 5 miles. ( i felt bad about that. ) She ended up staying on the ship waiting for me for 3 hours!

The next morning I crawl out of the rack and the wolves descended on my ass. I denied denied denied. . But I was caught brehs.

 

[Kenny West]

@ Mills story

 

[Ice Cold]

Lmao
I'll contribute
I was chilling outside a class room back in under grad and im chopping it up with my brother and I see this big girl watching me.
Now brehs I've been with big girls before [] but this girl had a big gut, small titties a mustache and just generally unattrachive
So she waits until there's a break in conversation and tries to start talking to me and she's like what'd you say your name was again?
Me: I never told you my name
Her: okay * walks off
My brother: why'd you have to do her like that?
Me:

 

[General Mills]

Here is one
I went on a date with a girl from POF she look bad as hell but when i picked her up

I was like SHE BIG AS A WHALE
I knew better though since it was only face pics but anyways
I was like its cool she could be a sweetheart size dont matter and it didnt really either but something caught my attention though

She came to my car i drove at that time a SUV she sat in my car NO JOKE MY CAR WAS TILTING TO HER SIDE

Im like ah shyt. Made it kind of hard to drive so we go to the movies. she didnt order no food or anything but everybody looking at me like

Man we had to sit in the HANDICAP SEATS so i was like it is what it is. Were Watching 2012 my ass fell asleep on her. Man she was comfortable to sleep on i woke up at the end of the movie in between her chest didnt even realize it.

Long story short: Being a nice guy that i was i still took her out went to movies and she said im not her type cuz im TOO SMALL

 

[Racked Up]

Lmao
I'll contribute
I was chilling outside a class room back in under grad and im chopping it up with my brother and I see this big girl watching me.
Now brehs I've been with big girls before [] but this girl had a big gut, small titties a mustache and just generally unattrachive
So she waits until there's a break in conversation and tries to start talking to me and she's like :princess: what'd you say your name was again?
Me: I never told you my name
Her: okay * walks off
My brother: why'd you have to do her like that?

guess that explains the sn

 

[Hawaiian Punch]

This is long but. . . Oh well. You ever fukk a girl that nobody is supposed to know about? A fat girl. . .

Well I was in the Navy. We were getting ready to ship out for three weeks and I was in this local bar trolling for some strange before we left the next morning. All of a sudden this chick walks in. . Big ol titays but bigger gut.

But she was down for the get down. She asked for me to drive her home. . On the way she says how about a hotel I figure why not. I will never see her again and I will get a chance to run up in something. For some reason that night I was a super machine. I fukked ol girl all night. Dropped her ass off at home in the morning and went to the ship. I never even told her my real name. . only my nickname.

Fast forward three weeks later. What me and my boys used to do was what we called " ugly wife watch " When the ship was pulling into the berth we would chill outside and look at all the ugly navy wives on the pier waiting for their husbands. Well my homie goes. . WE GOT A WINNER!! LOOK AT THIS TRAVESTY!

I grab the binoculars. Its ol girl!! She is out there with a sheer white and lace outfit on. Short ass skirt and her titays were out everywhere. So was her stomach. My boys are all howling! They cant wait to see who she is coming to see.

Im scared brehs. And I am confused. HOW THE HELL DID SHE FIND ME? Found out later she knew that my ship was pulling out the next day. . I told her that. So she went to the Base Quarterdeck and they told her what ship left on what day. She then found out where we were berthed at. . She then walked in the parking lot and saw my car so she knew where I would be and when we were coming back. This chick CSI'd the game to find me.

But she still does not know my name. BUT! BUT!! Never underestimate the power of nikkas. We pull in. She walks up the ship. . . All the black dudes CANNOT WAIT to see who she is coming for. . She gets on but does not know my name. She is trying to describe to the guy on watch who I am. . . Then she mentions my car. THEY ALL KNOW.

I am not ashamed to admit. . I ran. . . I hid in a empty rack. . Closed the curtains and went to sleep. They were calling my name on the intercom for like 30 min straight. The wolves on the ship were ruthless. They looked for me everywhere and they INVITED her on the ship. About 30 dudes were chilling in the mess hall with her waiting on me to show. I was

Long story short. They started talking to her. . She told them how I fukked her like she had never been fukked.. How I was amazing and that she wanted me again. Told them she did not have a car. She walked on the base. Which had to be at least 5 miles. ( i felt bad about that. ) She ended up staying on the ship waiting for me for 3 hours!

The next morning I crawl out of the rack and the wolves descended on my ass. I denied denied denied. . But I was caught brehs.

lol Damn that foul. and funny. followed by more foul